Culture Clash Wednesdays #9 The Stigma Of Adoption
I'll never forget that moment in my life. It changed everything for me. I knew I would feel complete after it happened. I had wanted it for so long. I had spend countless nights crying in my bed, hoping one day it might happen.Finally, the day had arrived... and I was going to be adopted by my dad. I was going to sign the papers and everyone would know he was my dad. I wouldn't have to dread Father's Day anymore, I could actually look forward to it. I finally had someone to call daddy.Adoption has always held an extremely important place in my heart. My mom raised my brother and I alone until she met my father. Everything fell into place when he came into our lives. I even started calling him dad right away. It was a word I had always wanted to use and never had a chance to. I have always been proud to tell people my father adopted me. As I've grown up with this reality in my life, I've realized not everyone sees it as something special. Each culture sees it differently. Some know the love it offers and others see it as something shameful. I recently read an article in The New York Times about a Korean couple. This couple had adopted a baby into their family. They knew their family would never approve so instead of telling them the truth, they told their parents the father had an affair. An affair was more acceptable than adoption... I read this article multiple times because I couldn't believe it. This couple longed to have a child of their own. This should have been a blissful moment. Instead, they were worried about what to tell their families. I've heard similar stories from families around the world. Some of them have kept the truth from their child to save them from pain and other keep the secret in fear of what others might think.If you raise a child without telling them the truth, they will think it's something to be ashamed of.[tweetthis display_mode="box"]We have to stop the stigma surrounding adoption and remember adoption means one more child is loved for. #aiwtribe[/tweetthis]One more child isn't alone.One more child has a parent.
How were you raised to think of adoption?
Enjoy Every Season Of Parenting
People are constantly asking us if we were crazy, deciding to have three boys so close together. Maybe a little, but I’m loving this decision more and more everyday.Sunny Days and Play Dough
Warm, sunny days in the Pacific Northwest are beautiful. My husband, boys, and I could spend the entire day outside, exploring. My husband and I watch the kids pick up sticks and turn them into swords while Liam sings the theme song to Jake and the Neverland Pirates. This week was one of those great weeks. Just about every day has been amazing. Today, we played outside for most of the day. Then we came inside, every door and window open, and made some play dough. The kids were ecstatic. They were so excited to help mommy make something fun. There are so many recipes for play dough on the internet. Some are super easy and work out well and others are a waste of time. Out of all the recipes I've found, this has been the one we use time and time again. Another great thing about this is that everything is safe to eat. My little, troublemaking Levi always tries to sneak some. Using this recipe is great because I never worry. Ingredients:1 cup water1 cup flour2 tbs cream of tartar 1/2 cup salt2 tbs of oilfood coloringDirections:Mix all of your ingredients in a saucepan and cook on low. Continue stirring until all of your ingredients start to pull together and form a ball. Let it cool and then have fun!If you store it in a ziplock bag or airtight container, it will keep for about 4-6 months. **You can use any type of oil. The only thing you can't substitute would be the cream of tartar. It is the reason it keeps for so long.**
All Parent Should Listen To Advice
My little baby. I remember when I was pregnant with him. Every month was new and exciting while I watched my belly grow.What Do Real Parents Look Like?
Things around our house have been a little crazy since baby Lucas joined us. Most days consist of coffee, breastfeeding, movies, dishes, spit up stained clothes, toys everywhere, constantly stepping on said toys, bad attitudes, sword fights, towers of laundry, nap time, and repeat. Our day isn't structured much beyond nap times. That might be because I count down until nap time sometimes... ok a lot of the time. Joel will come home from a trip and ask about our week. I always have countless stories to tell him about our silly boys, but it's usually not a lot of anything productive. Some days are more about surviving while Joel is away and other days we are adventurous and decide to go and have a play date. Most of the time, I'm completely satisfied with my days. I know this is a busy season for our growing family. We have three kids under four and life with them is chaotic. Then it happens... I go on Instagram or Facebook and see other moms. They snap a quick picture of their seemingly perfect lives and I stare at it for more time than I'd like to admit. I sit their thinking what a better mom they are than me, how perfect their house looks, how much fun it looks like their kids have, how put together the mom looks, how their husbands are always right their in the picture.. It's easy to start comparing myself to them. Why can't my life look like that?Wait. Why does it have to!? If you think about it, it's easy to take a peaceful picture of your beautiful living room, interesting book, and not let the viewer in on the fact that all of your children are screaming in the background. We are constantly showing the best glimpse possible into our lives on social media. I'm guilty of doing it too! Why do we do it? Well, I know I'm the one that does it to say, "Look at my perfect life." I want to show off how great it can be sometimes. I want to prove that I'm doing a good job. While it's not bad to be grateful for the blessings in our life, we need to be happy regardless of how perfect our day is. We need to be happy in the midst of chaos and in the peace and quiet. Life as a parent is a compilation of different seasons. You have the newborn season, the crawling and getting into everything season, the send them off to school my house is empty season, the oh my gosh when did my kids get smarter than me season, the wow my kiddo is my best friend season, the why won't my kid remember how cool I am season, and all of those can be great. I challenge all of you to share a real picture of your day on Instagram and use the hashtag #RealParents. Beautiful you in the middle of a messy house, with your dinner burning, and all. Ok. Well, hopefully your dinner won't be burning, but you know what I mean. It's so encouraging to see other parents in the midst of it all. We can be there and encourage each other on those draining days and jump up and down together on the great days.
Why Are You Sorry I Have Three Kids?
If you're a kid person at all, you love babies. They're so cute! You can cuddle them, make silly sounds to them, and everything they do is adorable.When I had my first son, Liam, everyone was so encouraging! I'd walk into grocery stores and would be stopped down every aisle. They all wanted to look at the little boy with "all that hair!" They started gushing when I said he was my first. We got pregnant with Levi and most people were still thrilled. They said I was crazy to have them so close, but were still positive overall. My little Lucas, baby number three was a different story. Instead of being positive and encouraging, I got a much different response. "Wow. Are all these kids yours?""Three boys? I'm sorry."
