Where Does Prejudice Start?

We have come so far in the last few hundred years. Schools are no longer segregated, we don't make laws based on race,  and we don't prevent people to vote based on gender. However, there is still a real fight against prejudice.People still assume entire races of people are a certain way or do the same thing. It doesn't matter if they have actually seen this to be true or not, their prejudice opinions are like a wild fire. One person believes something to be true and it starts to spread to all of the people around them. It doesn't need any truth to spread, rather ignorant individuals. How can you fight against something so big? Something that has been going on for hundreds of years? Well, you can go back to where it all begins. 

Can you guess where prejudice starts?

It starts in your very own home. Now, I'm not saying you actually sit down and teach your children to be prejudice.Ok, little Timmy. Remember, anytime you see an East Indian man, they...Rather, it's the opposite. The lack of information about different races is what causes prejudice. Children need to learn about the world around them. [tweetthis twitter_handles="@almstindianwife" display_mode="box"]Learning about the world around them, will help kids be more comfortable in who they are. [/tweetthis]Taking the time to learn about the world around them will help children to realize everyone is different. Instead of assuming different qualities based on race, they will understand we live in a diverse world with many different cultures. Each culture can be vastly different, even within the same race. 

Teach Your Kids Young And Prevent Prejudice 

Read diverse books as a family. 

Reading as a family is important for so many different reasons. Make sure your books don't reflect a single race. Rather, encourage your children to get books that show our colorful world.

Make food from different countries. 

Kids learn though hands on experiences. Look up some different recipes online, or check out my Pinterest board where I've done it all for you. Choose a recipe and make it as a family. While you're making it, discuss the culture. Do they eat with their hands? Do they use chopsticks?

Listen to music from around the world.

My children LOVE music. We always throw on different songs from around the world in the car and at home. It doesn't even have to be in English. Just turn it on and have a dance party as a family!

Answer their questions about world, even if they are BIG questions for little kids. 

Kids will ask questions as they think of them. A dangerous thing to do as a parent is put them off and not answer. Their is always an age appropriate way to answer BIG questions. Create open communication with your children so they go to you for answers rather than their friends who may give a prejudice answer. 

Travel!

Pack up your bags and take a family vacation. Instead of Disney Land this year, go to Hyderabad, India! You can teach your children different phrases or words in Telugu, teach them to eat with their hands, and have a great time! 

Get travel books and discuss different traditions in foreign countries. 

Before you go, grab some travel books. They're great because they discus the culture and so much more! They even have pictures! This will create instant conversations with your kids and get them excited to visit. 

Play games from different places. 

Look online and find some fun games kids play around the world. Try it out and see how easy or hard they are in comparison to your children's favorite games. 

Watch foreign movies.

On your next family movie night, put on a foreign movie. You can turn on the subtitles and watch a new world. My kids love to watch Telugu movies, even though they don't know what they're saying. They watch and talk about what's happening the entire time!Head over to 5 Minutes For Mom to see my post where I discuss other ways to teach your children about different cultures. The biggest and most important thing you can do is talk. Talk with your kids about the world. A small conversation every day can put an end to something as rampant as prejudice. Let's join together and stop prejudice!

How Can You Use Education And Laughter Against Ignorance?

There was an article that made it's way around Facebook a few months ago. A friend of ours had shared it with my husband, Joel and it went viral! So many people could relate to the hilarious questions people ask. When people find out my husband is East Indian, they tend to ask him a lot of questions. Most of the time, the questions are simply... ridiculous. My favorite question people have asked me about my husband is, "Does he speak Indian?"I truly hope I have at least taught most of you at least a few things about Indian culture. At least enough to know that no one speaks Indian, rather one of the hundreds of dialects found in India. Joel speaks Telugu.  I used to ignore people's mistake and answer their question, pretending they said the right thing. Now, I just laugh. It would be like me walking into a room of people and asking someone if they spoke American. We've seen the same things with our kids. People are already asking us hilarious questions about our mixed kids. It's funny to think about the questions our boys will have to answer through out their lives. Some of them will be funny like this and others will be insulting. I want my husband and I to raise our kids to respond well, regardless of what people do or say. We can't control what people do, but we can control our response. 

[tweetthis twitter_handles="@almstindianwife" display_mode="box"]"Two things reduce prejudice: education and laughter." -Laurence J. Peter[/tweetthis]

I love this quote because it really hits the point head on. It's easy for people to let anger take over when faced with prejudice or ignorance, but it won't change anything. Anger only fuels more anger. Instead, we need to teach our children how to respond. They can either teach people or laugh. 

 

If someone ignorantly says something that offends you, take a minute and teach them something. They probably didn't realize that they said was offensive. Bring laughter to the situation and make a joke!

 

[tweetthis twitter_handles="@almstindianwife" display_mode="box"]Keeping your calm in the face of ignorance creates an opportunity for change.[/tweetthis]

 

How Can We Teach Our Children To Be World Changers?

People are always telling me to enjoy every minute of parenthood. To be honest, some days are just survival so it can be difficult to savor the moment. Especially when I’m trying to fish my son’s ninja turtle toys out of the toilet. Today, I was searching through old pictures to see baby pictures of my little boys. Then the emotions hit and I realized just how big all three of them are. They aren’t itty bitties anymore.

(From the left: Liam, Levi, and Lucas)

Now, they’re becoming little men. My four year old is starting pre-k this year, my two year old is developing his LOUD personality, and my baby is getting closer and closer to his first birthday.

I find myself using the “I’ll do it when they’re older” excuse a lot. I have three kids under five. There is so much I want to teach them. So much I want to show them in life, but I should wait until they’re old enough to understand, right? No. They may not understand some huge concepts right just yet, but you can bring it to their level now and start. We need to teach our kids about the world. We need to show them how unique every culture is and how each one makes the world a better place. We need to teach them all to stand up and challenge prejudice and racism and love everyone. We can’t wait. We need to start today. So, what can we do today to teach them to be world changers and how to stand up against intolerance?Teach them about the uniqueness of other cultures.This one seems like an easy one, but it can be overlooked. We need to show our kids other cultures. This can be done by introducing them to foods foreign to them, reading books about different customs, listening to music, watching movies, attending festivals, etc. We aren’t limited in the ways we can teach our kids about the world around them. The more they know about other cultures, the more they can challenge ignorance.Use every moment as a teaching opportunity.Every moment with our child is an opportunity to teach them about the world they live in. It would be nice to keep them from the negative lessons; however, it’s impossible. Situations will occur around them and their little brains instantly start trying to process it. Ignoring it, crossing our fingers, and hoping our child didn’t notice won’t work. We need to use it to our advantage. We need to teach them what they could have done in the situation or why it’s wrong.The opposite is true as well. We can highlight the moments that show the love of other cultures and tolerance. As our child sees examples of what to do, they will start figuring out what it would look like in their own life.Encourage them to have a voice.Kids have so much to say. They can ramble on for hours about Legos, dolls, and what they did yesterday. That means they’re finding their voice. They’re figuring out what they think about the world and how to explain that to us.It’s easy, in the midst of a busy day, to quiet our kids and push them off.Give me a minute, I’m working.Can you tell me later?Hold on.Instead of pushing them off, listen. We need to pause everything we’re doing, listen, and hear what they have to say. As we reinforce them by making them the priority, they will gain the confidence to speak up more. If they’re going to be world changers, they need to have the confidence to speak up and say what they think.Then we can take it a step further and ask them what they think.How do you think we can teach our children to be world changers? 

How To Respond To Racism

I recently watched a video floating around the internet. The video shows a Sikh boy being called a terrorist, while riding home on his school bus. He responds by recording the event. A little warning, he decides to call them a mother f$&@ker. I'm sorry, but I can't say I'd stay calm in a situation like that either! This brings light to a bigger issue. Why was the girl in the video using a word as colorful as terrorist? She must have heard this before from someone in her life. Children imitate behavior they have seen. Racism is all around us. It may not be as prevalent where you live, but it happens every day. It's happening in grocery stores, at work, and on school buses full of children. 

 

Stories like this infuriate me and my anger stares the ignorant person right in the face. If I were in this situation, I would be yelling and showing another "great" example. So, what should we do in response to racism?

 

Stay calm

 

Don't respond in your anger. As hard as it is to not let your anger fuel your words, you need to take a deep breath. Separate your emotions from the situation as much as you possibly can and remember this is an opportunity to fight racism. 

 

Don't laugh

 

I've heard advice from people, saying you should laugh it off. Don't worry about it and just laugh so they stop talking about it. No. Laughter at racism only reinforces racist behavior. Whether it's a joke or a derogative comment, don't laugh. Racism is not funny. 

 

Ignore it or confront the issue. 

 

This is a tricky decision. You can either ignore it and walk away or confront the situation. Think about the situation. Are you in a state where you can respond in a constructive manner? If not, walk away from the situation. You can confront it later when you've calmed down. There's no need to get into a screaming match. Chances are the person won't hear a word you're saying anyways. When you are calm or if you are ready to confront the situation in the moment, take a deep breath and respond. 

 

Confront the issue, not the person

 

Confront the issue at hand, racism. It goes beyond one ignorant person and brings us to the culprit. Racism is fueled by ignorance. If the racism is in the form of a joke, ask them why they think that's funny. Or simple say, you don't think comments like that are appropriate. 

 

It's easy for us to ignore a situation so we don't stand out. Maybe, we want to fade into the background.. Maybe, we don't want the drama.. Regardless, racism is a global issue. Its victims are adults and children, children trying to ride home on a school bus. Stand up against racism. 

We Are The Fifteen Percent

I love sharing my blog with people. It's a great opportunity to talk to others about my marriage and what I've learned. Who doesn't want to talk to people about something that's made them so happy? I'm constantly looking up like-minded blogs. I want to hear other stories similar to mine, get advice, and see if they face the same challenges. I'm surprised when I only stumble upon a few. I forget that intercultural marriages aren't as common as I'd like to think. In a recent statistic, they stated only 15 percent of new marriages are intercultural. It's such a small group! So small in fact that it's started a movement called We Are The Fifteen Percent! There's a website where people all over the US share their pictures and show off their beautiful intercultural family. What a great idea! I love browsing through all the new pictures every month. It's encouraging when my husband and I go through challenging seasons. My husband and I have been very blessed to be in such a great community of people that support our marriage. All marriages have their struggles and some of ours come from blending two cultures, but most is just our stubborn attitudes. There are many intercultural marriages out there that can say the same thing. Not all couples are that lucky. Some are faced with tremendous prejudice and racism. I stumbled onto a story in the news this week. A server at a Buffalo Wild Wings was faced with racism over her relationship. She is white and her boyfriend is black which was apparently very offensive to a group of drunk kids. They started calling her boyfriend terribly derogative names. She then proceeded to write a blog post about it. She couldn't believe that this could still happen in 2015. Her post went viral! Thousands of people shared it and it had close to one million views. You would think that she would be greeted with a huge community support. She had a lot of positive and encouraging words alongside hate mail and death threats. Racism is real people. It hasn't gone away. Intercultural relationships may be more accepted, but it is the minority. What can you do?Be open to anything different and educate yourself. Learn about other cultures. Instead of awkwardly staring at someone with a turban, look up why they wear it. Every culture is rich with differences. Yours isn't better just because you're comfortable with it. If you'd like to share your story, share a picture of you and you're partner on Instagram and tag me @almstindianwife or share it on my facebook page. The more people hear and see the 15 percent, the less novel it becomes, and the more we defeat prejudice and racism.