The First Lie I Ever Told My In-Laws

There were quite a few scary and intimidating moments I had encountered while dating my boyfriend at the time. I knew I was falling hard for Joel, but it was all so new to me. I was young and he was my first serious relationship. As you all know, serious relationships come with a lot of intimidating experiences.One of the scariest is meeting that family for the first time. You want them to love you right away, but instead of going into it with a cool head, your mind plays tricks on you.Would I say the right thing? What would their first impression of me be? Would they like me? Would I survive the night?Some of you have heard bits of this story before. I met my in-laws for the first time in Texas. Cali-Mama (my husband's uncle) lived there and was eager to host Thanksgiving. Their family looked forward to the holidays every year because it meant everyone would come together and soak up as much time with each other as they could.This year was special because Joel invited me along. In his mind, he figured everyone was together so what better time to introduce my girlfriend.I was excited to meet these people Joel had spent so much time talking about but secretly terrified. There are so many people in my husband's immediate family which meant I had a lot of people to convince. To convince that we were a great couple and that I was in it for the long run.Luckily, I was able to transition into the house with ease. We had arrived early so there were only a few people there. Joel's two uncles picked us up from the airport. We quickly hopped into the back seat and I noticed there was a car seat. We sat on either side of it and his uncle (granted his white uncle who is also in an interracial marriage) told me it was there on purpose to keep us apart. I started to laugh and he didn't.... I quickly learned his sense of humor and picked up on the fact that he liked teasing and messing with me. It truly helped take the edge off.The next few days, he proceeded to give me a few pointers and tell me how it was for him coming into the family almost a decade before.He and his wife had one of the first interracial marriages in their family and truly broke the mold for the rest of us. It was a bigger struggle for them because everyone was trying to figure out what it would look like.Would they follow all of the Indian traditions? Would they need to behave like an Indian couple?Luckily for us, they walked through the fire so we didn't have to. Nevertheless, hearing all of his stories made me even more nervous about meeting Joel's mom. I wanted so desperately for her to like me.I’ll never forget the night I met Joel’s mom. Joel decided to be a good son and terrible boyfriend by picking his mom up from the airport. He was a great son because what mom doesn’t want to be picked up from their son who they haven’t seen in a while. Don’t forget the terrible boyfriend part. I was about to meet his mom and what does he do?LEAVES ME ALONE. I ended up pacing the living room the entire time. An hour later, I heard the garage door open.What was I thinking? I can just leave. Walk home. Maybe they won’t notice. Or I can hide.Joel’s sister came in first and she was so sweet and calmed me down so much when she gave me a big hug. Okay, a nice sister. I can do this.Then Joel’s mom came in. She was quiet, slowly walking towards me. I’m sure she was checking me out thinking who in the world is this girl dating my son.She gave me a hug and walked into the kitchen. She then proceeded by asking me what kind of food I cooked. Apparently, Joel told her I made casseroles. Thanks, Joel. First of all, I have NEVER made him a casserole. Ever. What was I supposed to say? I was twenty and barely knew how to cook. So, I said I made casseroles.I couldn’t decide if she liked me the whole weekend! I second guessed every look and everything she said!I quickly learned Joel’s mom’s sense of humor.. She has this quiet, sarcastic humor that is hilarious. However, if you don’t know her it freaks you out because you can’t tell if she’s serious! Now, we have a great relationship.She teases me about being white and I remind her that I’m more Indian than her son. She would never tell me, but I’ve heard through the grapevine that she’s told people I’m becoming more Indian! Two points for the almost Indian wife.Maybe one day you will be reading my new blog… The INDIAN Wife.

Raising Grateful Children: Thank You For My Siblings!

Have you ever wondered if you're raising grateful children? If your children are grateful for the people they love in their lives? Here are a few things you can start doing today to make sure you're raising grateful children!Raising Grateful ChildrenI don't know what it is, but have you ever noticed that every time you need to make an important phone call your kids go crazy?This afternoon I had to call my health insurance company. I only had an hour before they closed and I figured I would try and call while my two youngest were napping. They usually answer pretty quickly so I thought I could get it all done before my boys woke up.After about 15 minutes on hold I realized quick wasn't in the cards for today.Then my three year old woke up and thought it would be helpful to wake up his baby brother. I went up there, phone up to my ear, to grab them. Baby Luke's crib was full of toys along with a 3 year old big brother.They were both grinning ear to ear and loving their mischievousness!I ended up letting them destroy their room so I could finish my supposedly "quick" phone call. I have to admit, I love that they're getting closer.It's one of the reasons I wanted to have my kids so close together. I knew it would come with it's own set of craziness, but it would be worth it. I wanted my kids to be close.I was worried in the beginning because all my boys would do was fight! My husband and I joked about their love-hate relationship, but deep down I was worried they wouldn't be as close as I hoped. Now that they're a bit older, I'm starting to see how deep their brotherly bond really is.They all look to each other for approval, wanting to make sure their brothers think they're doing something amazing. The best is while we sit down for meals. They start telling jokes and instantly look to make sure their brothers are laughing at them! Even Baby Lucas joins in! No one knows what he actually says, but they love that he's trying and think his' hilarious!I want them to continue getting closer as they get older.I want my kids to be best friends.

3 Ways To Ensure You're Raising Grateful Children

This month, I want my kids to take a moment to be grateful for their siblings. The more they learn what they love and value in each other, the closer they'll be.

Lead By Example

If we want to teach our kids to be grateful, we have to start by being grateful ourselves. Kids are always looking to their parents to figure out what to do. If they can see us being grateful and loving to those around us, they'll follow suit.Parents can model gratitude by verbally expressing it, sending thank you notes, and even giving little gifts.Remind your kids how important to be thankful for people they love and talk to them about it. Let them know why you're thankful for them!

Create A Habit

Instead of being grateful once a year on Thanksgiving, make it a year long routine. Create a habit in your home to talk about what your thankful for. Whether it's over dinner each night, as you tuck your kids in bed, or on the way home from a busy day.It doesn't matter when you do it, just do it. Create those conversations early on so they become normal.

Sibling Dates

As your kids watch you leading a grateful life and a let it become a habit in their own, it will quickly start to affect their relationships with their siblings.You can foster their relationships with each other more by letting them have sibling dates!Do something fun and take them to a movie! Let them choose what they want to see together and their snacks! Or let them come up with their date night on their own. Encourage them to have fun thinking up the whole night and what they're going to do.The most important thing you can do as a parent is to help your children build strong relationships with each other.These relationships are going to last for their entire lives. By helping your kids learn how to be grateful for each other, you're making sure they have a strong foundation that can last through it all.

What tips do you have for helping your kids be grateful for their siblings?

How Can Evite Help Make Thanksgiving Easier?

Are you hosting Thanksgiving this year? Is this your first time hosting or has your place always been the place to be for Thanksgiving? If you answered yes to any of these questions, then Evite is here to help you! I’ve partnered up with them this month to show off some of their gorgeous new holiday designs. Their designs are easy to use and perfect for invitations and thank you notes! This post is sponsored by Evite. 

Holidays In Our Blended Family

Starting a family means you are embarking on a life full of new adventures and traditions together. My husband and I have been able to show each other our childhood family traditions. He has shown me Indian traditions and customs he grew up with. They were all new for me and I jumped on the chance to learn. Since his family moved to the US shortly before he was born, he had a unique opportunity to discover new American traditions with his family. Thanksgiving was a new holiday for them and they started to create new memories and traditions together, including his mom’s famous lemon pepper turkey!

While I didn’t have any new customs to share with my husband, I was able to share some of our holiday traditions with him. My family loves fall because it means we get to celebrate one of our favorite holidays, Thanksgiving! I don’t have one memory growing up of my family apart on Thanksgiving. We have always come together, made way too much food, and spent the day laughing.

  

Our First Time Hosting Thanksgiving 

I couldn’t wait to spend Thanksgiving together with my husband. After we were married, we had spent most of our Thanksgiving’s with his side of the family. One year we decided to throw a special Thanksgiving dinner of our own. We stayed home and invited all of our friends. We deemed it our “Friend’s Thanksgiving.” 

 

Hosting an event as big as Thanksgiving can be quite intimidating. We decided to make the turkey and a few other dishes. Our friends each chose a side or two and prepared them at home. My husband and I looked up turkey recipes all week. We were excited and terrified to make our first one. 

 

We woke up early in the morning to get the house ready and have enough time to prep the turkey. We debated over who had to clean out the turkey, rubbed it down with delicious spices, and then tried to figure out what to tie the legs with. We didn't realize that was part of the turkey making process and used the only thing we had...yarn. I took pictures of every step to show off our beautiful turkey. Unless we botched it, then we’d destroy all evidence of the turkey fiasco. 

 

Our friends started to arrive and the smell of our delicious turkey filled the house. It was a success! All of our hard work and fussing over the turkey paid off and we couldn’t wait to dig in. Our friend’s thanksgiving is one of our favorite memories. It was a chance for all of us to do something new and start a new tradition together. I love that we were able to come together and make it happen. 

 

Hosting your first big holiday is scary, thrilling, and exciting. I love that we were able to do it with all of our friends.

How Can Evite Help You This Thanksgiving?

 

Evite is here to make it a little easier for you. All you need to do is sign up for an account. Then you can design your own invitation or thank you card. The best part is there are so many beautiful designs to choose from and it’s easy!

 

They’re even giving all of you a FREE GIFT! All of you, my lovely readers, get 15 free “Thank You Cards!” All you need to do is go here and use the code BMTHANKYOU15

 

Make sure you take a peak at Evite's new designs.

 

What did you think of Evite's new designs? Let us know on twitter. 

 

[tweetthis display_mode="button_link"]@evite @almstindianwife[/tweetthis]

 

 

“This post is part of a sponsored campaign on behalf of the South Asian Bloggers Network for Evite and I have received compensation for this post. All opinions are my own.”