5/19/18 5/19/18

How To Challenge Racism And Prejudice As A Family

Over the last eight years in my interracial marriage, my eyes have been open up to a new world.

I had no idea how sheltered I was in my own little bubble. I grew up in a white community, with a white family, and white friends.I loved everyone I met, so it wasn't an issue of any ill-feelings on my part. I simply didn't know a life outside my own. I never learned about cultures around the world other than the little bit they teach us in history class.It wasn't until I married my wonderful husband that I saw the harsh reality that racism exists. The fact that an entire people group could be stereotyped as one personality or one characteristic of an extremist. It's easier for society to clump people together rather than get to know the actual people involved.Even though you may have the same ethnic background as someone, by no way means your culture was the exact same growing up. Our culture is so much more than just our ethnicity. It's the way you grew up, your beliefs, whether or not you were the oldest in the family, the situations you've experienced, and everything that has shaped you to be the person you are today.

Racism and prejudice aren't hidden from society. It's out in the open every day.

We see it in the news.We see if when we walking in town and someone crosses the street just to avoid walking next to a man of color.We see it when people make a rude, stereotypical joke to a friend.We see it when people spew hateful, toxic things to people they've never even met.It's happening every day, all around you. Here's the problem. People either give excuses to why they did what they did or claim they didn't know any better. We're no longer living in a day and age where those excuses work. We are fighting for a better world for our kids. This fight means we have to stand up and say this is not ok. We have to challenge wrong thinking and start learning about those around us.

Let's start by learning a few definitions.

Racism: prejudice, discrimination, or antagonism directed against someone of a different race based on the belief that one's own race is superior.Prejudice: preconceived opinion that is not based on reason or actual experience.Ignorance: lack of knowledge or information.Racism and prejudice are both learned behaviors. Through out our lives people have shaped what we believe. Maybe you grew up in a family that made racist remarks. Or maybe they lived in their bubble like I did growing up and didn't know better.

Either way, ignorance leads to both racism and prejudice.

So how can we stop it? What can we do to make sure our kids don't learn this hate?We can teach our kids. It starts as simple as that. We can help them to have a deep love for cultures around the world. We can remind them to ask questions when they don't know something rather than lay a stereotypical label on it.Remember, kids learn by example. You need to be the right example to them and challenge yourself. If you mess up, admit it to them and have a conversation about it. If you see someone in their life, whether it's a family member or someone in the media, call out bad behavior. Don't ignore it when it happens. If you do, your kids will be left trying to figure it out on their own.

How can you challenge racism, prejudice, and ignorance around you?

11/3/17 11/3/17

3 Ways Multiracial Families Can Blend Holiday Traditions

The holidays have always been my favorite. My family went above and beyond for them and I knew it meant my family would all get together and we'd have a great time.Now that I have my own little family, I get to share that love with them!I want them to see how much fun it is to make Thanksgiving dinner, decorate for fall, pick the perfect gifts for loved ones, and check off our holiday bucket lists!As my kids have gotten older, I'm starting to see how our multiracial family has put a unique spin on the holidays. We're always looking for ways to blend our cultures into our little family. I want my boys to see how fun it is to figure out what the holidays mean to us.Are you trying to figure out what the holidays mean to your own family? Maybe you're attempting to blend all your traditions together and you need some help? I have a few tips for you that can make blending holiday traditions fun and simple!

Fill your house with decorations that can stay up longer!

Decorate for the season not just the holiday, especially for those families with many different holidays to celebrate together!

I love decorating my house in fall. I tend to do the bulk of my decorations in November and I make sure they fit for all of the holidays the next few months. I definitely have my Thanksgiving and Christmas decor, but I love how much I’ve done that can stick around all of winter! Can you guess what some of that is… I use a lot of gold spray paint, bright colors, and clear jars. I highlight the orange in fall and the blues in winter. It’s perfect. Diwali fits right in there with all of the bright colors!

Mix Up Your Holiday Menu.

Our family has learned to be a little creative with our holiday menus. While some families dream up the all American feast for Thanksgiving and Christmas, we think about all the dishes we can combine! Our dishes are full of butter chicken, turkey, and coconut green beans.

It works out really well for our family because we have a little bit from both of our childhood's. Not to mention, I'm always up for any excuse to eat more Indian food!

Try Out A New Tradition

Some families can feel pressure to bring in all the traditions they had growing up, but the holidays is a great time to try out something new. Think of a fun new tradition to start for your own family. You don't have to stick to a routine because it's what you've always done.Embrace your own family and put your spin on the holidays!You may even be surprised to find out you've already started one! Maybe you make the same thing ever Christmas morning or you you started making your famous dish for Thanksgiving. Sometimes the best traditions happen without even trying.How Do You Blend Holiday Traditions In Your Multiracial Family?

8/22/17 8/22/17

The First Lie I Ever Told My In-Laws

There were quite a few scary and intimidating moments I had encountered while dating my boyfriend at the time. I knew I was falling hard for Joel, but it was all so new to me. I was young and he was my first serious relationship. As you all know, serious relationships come with a lot of intimidating experiences.One of the scariest is meeting that family for the first time. You want them to love you right away, but instead of going into it with a cool head, your mind plays tricks on you.Would I say the right thing? What would their first impression of me be? Would they like me? Would I survive the night?Some of you have heard bits of this story before. I met my in-laws for the first time in Texas. Cali-Mama (my husband's uncle) lived there and was eager to host Thanksgiving. Their family looked forward to the holidays every year because it meant everyone would come together and soak up as much time with each other as they could.This year was special because Joel invited me along. In his mind, he figured everyone was together so what better time to introduce my girlfriend.I was excited to meet these people Joel had spent so much time talking about but secretly terrified. There are so many people in my husband's immediate family which meant I had a lot of people to convince. To convince that we were a great couple and that I was in it for the long run.Luckily, I was able to transition into the house with ease. We had arrived early so there were only a few people there. Joel's two uncles picked us up from the airport. We quickly hopped into the back seat and I noticed there was a car seat. We sat on either side of it and his uncle (granted his white uncle who is also in an interracial marriage) told me it was there on purpose to keep us apart. I started to laugh and he didn't.... I quickly learned his sense of humor and picked up on the fact that he liked teasing and messing with me. It truly helped take the edge off.The next few days, he proceeded to give me a few pointers and tell me how it was for him coming into the family almost a decade before.He and his wife had one of the first interracial marriages in their family and truly broke the mold for the rest of us. It was a bigger struggle for them because everyone was trying to figure out what it would look like.Would they follow all of the Indian traditions? Would they need to behave like an Indian couple?Luckily for us, they walked through the fire so we didn't have to. Nevertheless, hearing all of his stories made me even more nervous about meeting Joel's mom. I wanted so desperately for her to like me.I’ll never forget the night I met Joel’s mom. Joel decided to be a good son and terrible boyfriend by picking his mom up from the airport. He was a great son because what mom doesn’t want to be picked up from their son who they haven’t seen in a while. Don’t forget the terrible boyfriend part. I was about to meet his mom and what does he do?LEAVES ME ALONE. I ended up pacing the living room the entire time. An hour later, I heard the garage door open.What was I thinking? I can just leave. Walk home. Maybe they won’t notice. Or I can hide.Joel’s sister came in first and she was so sweet and calmed me down so much when she gave me a big hug. Okay, a nice sister. I can do this.Then Joel’s mom came in. She was quiet, slowly walking towards me. I’m sure she was checking me out thinking who in the world is this girl dating my son.She gave me a hug and walked into the kitchen. She then proceeded by asking me what kind of food I cooked. Apparently, Joel told her I made casseroles. Thanks, Joel. First of all, I have NEVER made him a casserole. Ever. What was I supposed to say? I was twenty and barely knew how to cook. So, I said I made casseroles.

I couldn’t decide if she liked me the whole weekend! I second guessed every look and everything she said!I quickly learned Joel’s mom’s sense of humor.. She has this quiet, sarcastic humor that is hilarious. However, if you don’t know her it freaks you out because you can’t tell if she’s serious! Now, we have a great relationship.She teases me about being white and I remind her that I’m more Indian than her son. She would never tell me, but I’ve heard through the grapevine that she’s told people I’m becoming more Indian! Two points for the almost Indian wife.Maybe one day you will be reading my new blog… The INDIAN Wife.

8/9/17 8/9/17

Should You Do Something You're Uncomfortable With In A Relationship?

I recently did a post discussing my decision to be open to what my elders have to say. I've struggled a lot with this while married to my husband. I am a very strong headed person and saw listening to elders as stifling what I wanted. After a lot of discussion with my husband, we’ve decided to be open to what our elders tell us or ask us to do. This doesn’t mean we blindly do everything they say. We hear what they say, discuss it together, and make our decision as a family.I've received a lot of feedback from this one. Some people understand why we've decided to do this and agree. Others say elders have no place in our relationship, so why would we listen to what they have to say. It's made me think about all of the different situations where this can come up and I realized there isn’t one way that works for every relationship.When you face a decision in a relationship, you have to make a decision together. You have to do what’s best for your family, not just one of you.In any relationship, you will be faced with decisions that affect your family. In an interracial relationship, you'll have to decide where you live, what religion your family will practice, what language is spoken in the house, how to discipline your children, how involved extended family will be, etc.What do you do when you’re asked to do something you’re uncomfortable with?What if your spouse wants you to move to their home country, but you don’t want to?What if your partner wants you to practice a joint family, but you don’t want your in-laws raising your children?What if you want to share your country with your spouse, but he/she won’t give it a chance?You both grew up with different ways of doing things. Each of your cultures tells you what’s normal and what’s not. When you begin an interracial relationship, you have to find a new normal for your family. This means coming together and figuring out what you’ll do together.

The biggest thing you have to keep in mind is that you both have to be happy with your decision.

A few years ago, my husband and I moved our family closer to his side of the family. This meant we moved 36 hours away from my family. It was a really big decision for us. If I wasn’t a part of the decision to move here, it could have caused a lot of issues in our marriage. It would have been easy for this to cause a rift between us. However, we made this decision when we first got married. We discussed where we wanted to settle down and agreed we would settle by his family. There are so many factors that helped us to make this decision.However, timing changed. Every few years we would talk about making the big move. To be honest, I wasn’t ready until a few years ago. I knew I wanted to do it, but it was hard for me to move so far from my family. I had to be fully ready and my husband patiently waited.Now, we’re here and our family is so happy. Sure, we all miss my family, but our reasons for moving here makes it worth it. Indian culture is present in our children’s lives every day. It’s much easier to put them in the middle of this vibrant culture when we’re around my husband’s family. By living closer to my in-laws, it also means my kids are around Telugu more often.

My husband and I made this decision for our family.

We made it together and did what we think is best for our family. You can’t look at other multiracial families and do exactly what they do or concede to the pressure from loved ones to run your family the exact same way they did. They have seen what works for them and try to push you to do the same thing.All you can do is listen to their advice, see how their family functions, and see what you can take from it. Chances are you will be able to take a few things and change other things to fit your family better. There is no right way to have a multiracial family or interracial relationship.You have to communicate with each other every day and constantly reevaluate. You can make a decision that works for a while, but you need to see how those decisions work as your family grows and changes.

11/8/15 11/8/15

Holiday Gift Guide From Around The World

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It’s that time of year. Parents are looking for a good gift guide. Children are writing down their Christmas lists and getting excited about what they’ll get! They usually have A LOT of ideas about what they want. My kids are adding to their lists every day! As of right now, it's full of Avenger's toys, costumes, video games, and candy..

I put together a HUGE gift guide for you and your family.

I’ve added some traditional East Indian accessories, amazing children’s books from around the world, my top books, and some MUST haves in the kitchen.

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Traditional Accessories/Clothing- Gift Guide

I love Indian accessories. I've been blessed with so many items from my in laws when they go and visit India. Here are a few items you can get for yourself or a loved one without having to leave the country! I even threw in a few Indian outfits!

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Children’s Books About The World- Gift Guide

We LOVE reading in our house. One thing we try to do is expose our children to books from around the world. Here are a few children's books that will liven up your children's book selections!

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Books For Adults- Gift Guide

Don't worry, I wasn't going to forget about you! Here are a few of my favorite books! They are full of inspirational stories of men, women, and children. You're bound to have some down time over the holidays, be sure to pick up one of these!

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Cooking- Gift Guide

Do you enjoy cooking or do it enough you want to make it a little easier? Here are some MUST haves in the kitchen and I even threw in my favorite chai tea!

Did you like the list? If so, please share!

10/25/15 10/25/15

What Do I Do If My Loved Ones Family Hates Me?

In a perfect world, your relationships would be supported by everyone around you. They would only see the love you have for your loved one and nothing else would matter. Instead people get held up on race, family background, and just about anything that makes you imperfect in their eyes. So, what do you do? What do you do if your relationship isn't supported by the people you love. What if your own family doesn't support your relationship? Do you let their opinions prevent you from being with the person you love? What if that choice means you or your loved one will get disowned from your family?

Make your choice together.

You need to sit down with your loved one and make the decision. Being in an intercultural relationship comes with it's challenges. These challenges are different for each family, but none of those challenges can compare to the love you have for one another. However, an un-supporting family can be destructive in a relationship.You both need decide if it's worth it. If it is then grab each other by the hand and face life together. You have to stand together otherwise the challenges can tear your relationship apart. You need to support each other.All you can do is trust that they will see the love you have for each other and grow to accept it. At the end of the day it's their choice to accept your relationship or not. It won't be you that changes their mind. They have to choose to be open to your intercultural relationship. You can't let their unwillingness prevent you from loving each other. Family is extremely important and I'm not saying throw your family away. What I am saying is that you can't choose how people respond. All you can do is be willing to fight for your family to accept your relationship.

Take it one day at a time.

Sometimes the challenges that can come with an intercultural relationship are overwhelming. You can get lost in it and lose sight of what's important. All you can do is take it one day at a time. Remember you love each other and that love is what's made everything worth it. Take your relationship with your family or your new family day by day. Just be yourself. Take every smile they give you, every nice comment, or any attention they pay to you as a success. It's one more positive experience with them that you can put under your belt. Try to let go of the negative experiences with them. They aren't worth remembering or wasting your time on. Instead try to build on the positive moments.

You're enough.

The biggest thing you need to focus on is that you are enough for each other. You're in this relationship because you are more than enough for one another. Don't let your in laws or your family's feelings about your relationship make you think you aren't enough. Often times, the problem isn't you. It's the idea of someone or something they didn't expect. They either expected someone within their race, religion, or similar family backgrounds. They don't know how to react to something different so they turn it into anger towards you. Don't let this drag you down.You are enough. Your relationship is worth any challenges that may come up because you love each other. Hold onto that love and let it change people.

Have you experienced similar struggles? What advice can you share with us?

10/16/15 10/16/15

Family Fridays #9 Edamame and Carrot Burgers

This week Priya has come to share a special recipe with you for family Friday! She blogs over at Cookilicious. Be sure to follow her on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and Pinterest.

Who taught you how to make this dish?

My mom used to make sandwiches back home and that formed the basis for me. She occasionally made aloo tikkis to go in the sandwich which would totally uplift the dish.What makes it special to you and your family? Me and my husband are healthy eaters for the week and cheaters on weekends. I think burgers can be extremely nutritious and healthy if made the right way.Do you have a special memory making this dish, learning to make it, or enjoying it?I think I was the happiest when I created this burger totally from scratch. It was an instant hit. Proud of my creation.Have you shared this dish with your spouse/loved one?What did he/she think? Oh yes, my husband is my tester. He tastes it all and gives me honest feedback. He loved this burger and was begging for more

Ingredients:2 cups cooked Edamame1 cup grated Carrots1 cup brown bread crumbs4 tbsp. oats powder4-5 garlic cloves, minced1 tbsp. ginger paste½ cup chopped spinach½ cup Dill leaves, chopped½ cup cilantro, chopped1 cup onion greens3-4 tbsp. Sriracha sauceSalt as requiredWhole wheat burger bunsFat free goat cheeseMustard sauce as requiredOil as requiredBlack sesame seeds for sprinkleLettuce, slices of onion and tomatoDirections:Coarsely pulse edamame and add it to a mixing bowl. Add carrots, ½ of the breadcrumbs, oats powder, garlic, ginger, dill leaves, cilantro, onion greens, sriracha sauce and salt. Mix it all well. Make medium size burger patties. Roll them over the remaining bread crumbs. Refrigerate it for 30 minutes at least.In a grill pan, pour some oil. Shallow fry the burger patties evenly on both the sides. Sprinkle sesame seeds as well.Warm the burger buns in microwave for 15 seconds. Spread some almond butter evenly on them. You can use regular butter as well. Place a lettuce on one side and the Pattie on the other. Place few slices of onions and tomatoes. Sprinkle some cheese, mustard sauce, sriracha sauce. Close the bun and enjoy your burger.Do you have a recipe you would like to share with us? If so, here is what you need to do!

10/9/15 10/9/15

Family Fridays #8 French Crepes

Today's Family Fridays is very special today. My beautiful friend Andy is sharing one of her family recipes with all of us!My name is Andy Rodríguez, I was born and raised in Guatemala. I really like to cook like my mom and my grandma. It runs in the family! I like to make dishes from all around the world. It's one of my favorites hobbies and I always enjoy cooking when I'm stressed. I also enjoy cooking for my friends, having them over, and having a great time together.I enjoy cooking with my mom, Marthalidia in my free time. We make a big lunch or a great dinner to share with the rest of my dad Gustavo, my sisters Sofia and Ana Paula, and the rest of my family. We are very close and we always do all kind of things together.This next family recipe is my famous French Crepes that my grandma Lidia thought me how to make. I've loved French food ever since. This is one of my favorites recipes. I really like that you can put whatever ingredients you want inside! You can make them salty or sweet.Ingredients:For the mix1 ¼ cup of flour1 cup of milk1 cup of water1 egg6 tablespoon of butter (I used blue bonnet sticks)¼ teaspoon of saltFor the filling (salty)3 sweet peppers (red, orange, onion)1 big onion1 lb of mushroomsCheese (Mozzarella, Gouda, or your favorite)HamFor the filling (sweet)NutellaIce-creamYour favorite fruitsDirections:Melt the butter in a small pot.Then add all the ingredients in the blender, when the butter is melt add it to the mix and blend.-And then you have the mix ready for the pan, I always use a big pan because I like big crepes. Cook one side first before adding the filling ingredients, when the edges look cooked you can turn the crepe and add whatever you want, and then enjoy them!*For the salty crepes I always chop all the veggies and then used a little bit of vegetable oil to cooked them on a pan. I cook the mushrooms in a different pan because they have a lot of water, after that I add them to the others and add the ham in little pieces.

9/28/15 9/28/15

Big Brother To The Rescue

Things have been a little crazy around here lately. My husband travels for work and he's been very busy the last few weeks. While he is away, life in our house is chaotic to say the least. It's jam packed full of sword fighting, half naked kids, arguing brothers, wrestling, teething babies, a dog who joins the fun, and an obsessive amount of iced coffee for mama. Maybe this is just typical for anyone that lives with three kids under five years old.While he's away, I do what I can to make our week run as smooth as possible. This means a lot of trips to the park, meal plans, swimming in the back yard, Indian food, and family movies. The park is perfect because it's about a ten minute walk from our house. The adventure there is perfect to wear them out and we find a few treasures along the way. As you can see, they love it. Things never run as smooth when my husband is away, but we make it work. Lately, my oldest Liam has decided he's going to help out when he's away. He's been learning what it means to be an anna to his younger brothers. Anna (pronounced unna) means older brother. My husband and I have taught him how important it is to be an anna to his brothers. As an anna, it's your responsibility to watch over your siblings, teach them, give them advice, love them, encourage, and correct them. He's only four, but he understands how special it is. He loves being able to teach his thammudus (pronounced thumb-or-doos). While we were at the park, I was watching my kids play. Levi, my wild child, started to climb a tree and got scared. He started yelling and I quickly jumped up to help, but stopped when I saw the most precious thing. Liam ran over with a very serious look on his face.It's ok thammudu! Anna is here. I'll help you down. Just look. You can do it. Go slow. You got it!!Usually Levi fights Liam over who's in charge. He say's he's not a thammudu (quite forcefully) and Liam jumps on the chance to correct him. Levi had no fight in him this time. He was in need and was perfectly happy letting his anna come and save him. As Levi stepped down, he gave Liam a big hug and they ran off together. I know it seems like a very small thing, but it wasn't. Levi is my middle child and loves to argue, stand up to everyone, and tell people to leave him alone.. I get worried that he won't let people help him when he really needs it. This special moment showed me how much he will rely on his anna when he needs it. Having three boys has proved chaotic, but I am so happy all three of them are becoming the best of friends. It means they will all be there for each other even if mommy and daddy aren't there all the time. Were you the anna/akka or the thammudu/celli in your family? What did that mean in your family?

9/25/15 9/25/15

Emergency Curry

One of my favorite things about my husband's family is how close they are. They would do anything for each other. I was able to see this first hand after we had my first son, Liam. My in laws knew we would need help after the baby, so they sent my father in law to stay with us for a few months. It was great because I was able to sit and relax with Liam while my father in law cooked for us. Maybe this is why Liam loves Indian food! We ate Indian food for every meal and it was delicious. The morning after he got to our house, he went to go and make us lunch. Our fridge and pantry were pretty bare because my husband and I hadn't been grocery shopping. I'm pretty sure we were delirious in the first few weeks of newborn exhaustion, so remembering to go grocery shopping wasn't likely. He smiled and said, that's ok. I'll make curry. He made us a delicious omelet and served it with chapatis. As he gave it to us, he told us it was his emergency curry. I think the name was perfect. It's so simple, but so good. You can have it for breakfast, a quick lunch, or next to a dish like keema curry. Ingredients:4 eggs1/4 tsp salt1 tbs curry powder1 tbs ginger garlic paste1/4 of a small diced onion*Optional 1/2 green chili chopped2-4 chapatisOlive oil or ghee for pan**optional add ins** spinich, peppers, mushrooms, ham, turkey, bacon, sausage.Directions:Heat your pan to medium/ low heat. Add oil or ghee to your pan. Then add your onions and green chilies. Allow them to brown for about 5 minutes. In a separate bowl, combine your eggs, ginger garlic paste, curry powder, salt, and your cooked onions. Mix well. Add more butter or ghee to your pan and pour in half of your egg mixture.Place a lid on your pan and allow it to cook for about 3-5 minutes until most of the egg mixture is cooked and it is easy to fold in half. Cook for 1 more minute or until the egg in the middle is cooked. Serve with a chapati and enjoy!

What is your go to "emergency meal?"

9/23/15 9/23/15

Culture Clash Wednesday #4 Left Handed Faux Pa

This week's culture clash brings up a story I still laugh about today. Right before I went to meet my husband's family, he gave me a few warnings. He tried to explain a bit about Indian culture. He didn't get into too much detail, but he gave me some ideas on what to expect. One thing he mentioned was that I should try and avoid using my left hand as much as I can. Now, growing up being left handed was a very good thing. My mom was left handed and we used to joke about what that meant. Obviously, it meant we were extremely smart and amazing. I mean hey, they even have left handers day. Obviously, this was different in Indian culture. In India, the left hand is used for sanitation purposes. It's considered extremely rude to use your left hand for anything else in India. They eat with their right hand, shake hands with their right hand, and touch people with their right hand. When I met my husband's family, I did my best to not use my left hand. Instead they all noticed right away and thought it was funny. They even teased me about it! Since they had all lived in the US for so long, they didn't refuse to use their left hand. They didn't make a big deal about it and some of them even had left handed kids. The only thing they didn't use their left hands for was eating. That's the one thing that stuck with them. The next time I was with all of my husband's family was during our wedding week. I knew I'd be one of the only whiteys there and I wanted to make a good impression on everyone. I was going to follow all of the customs I had learned, especially avoiding using my left hand. A lot of family was there from India and I wanted to do my best. Just like the time before, people quickly realized I was left handed. I learned to pick up on a few telugu words while I was there. The first two were thella pilla. Can you guess what that means? White girl, of course. It made it really easy to know when people were talking about me. The best was when I would over hear them talking about me, while staring, and then come up to me. Then they would ask if I was left handed. I always laughed and said yes. Then they'd go right back to their group and keep talking in telugu! I don't think this culture clash will ever go away. I'm still a lefty and it will always be taboo in Indian culture. I guess this means Indians don't celebrate left hander's day...

Have you ever experienced a culture clash? Share it and use the #CultureClashWednesday.

9/14/15 9/14/15

How Can We Teach Our Children To Be World Changers?

People are always telling me to enjoy every minute of parenthood. To be honest, some days are just survival so it can be difficult to savor the moment. Especially when I’m trying to fish my son’s ninja turtle toys out of the toilet. Today, I was searching through old pictures to see baby pictures of my little boys. Then the emotions hit and I realized just how big all three of them are. They aren’t itty bitties anymore.

(From the left: Liam, Levi, and Lucas)

Now, they’re becoming little men. My four year old is starting pre-k this year, my two year old is developing his LOUD personality, and my baby is getting closer and closer to his first birthday.

I find myself using the “I’ll do it when they’re older” excuse a lot. I have three kids under five. There is so much I want to teach them. So much I want to show them in life, but I should wait until they’re old enough to understand, right? No. They may not understand some huge concepts right just yet, but you can bring it to their level now and start. We need to teach our kids about the world. We need to show them how unique every culture is and how each one makes the world a better place. We need to teach them all to stand up and challenge prejudice and racism and love everyone. We can’t wait. We need to start today. So, what can we do today to teach them to be world changers and how to stand up against intolerance?Teach them about the uniqueness of other cultures.This one seems like an easy one, but it can be overlooked. We need to show our kids other cultures. This can be done by introducing them to foods foreign to them, reading books about different customs, listening to music, watching movies, attending festivals, etc. We aren’t limited in the ways we can teach our kids about the world around them. The more they know about other cultures, the more they can challenge ignorance.Use every moment as a teaching opportunity.Every moment with our child is an opportunity to teach them about the world they live in. It would be nice to keep them from the negative lessons; however, it’s impossible. Situations will occur around them and their little brains instantly start trying to process it. Ignoring it, crossing our fingers, and hoping our child didn’t notice won’t work. We need to use it to our advantage. We need to teach them what they could have done in the situation or why it’s wrong.The opposite is true as well. We can highlight the moments that show the love of other cultures and tolerance. As our child sees examples of what to do, they will start figuring out what it would look like in their own life.Encourage them to have a voice.Kids have so much to say. They can ramble on for hours about Legos, dolls, and what they did yesterday. That means they’re finding their voice. They’re figuring out what they think about the world and how to explain that to us.It’s easy, in the midst of a busy day, to quiet our kids and push them off.Give me a minute, I’m working.Can you tell me later?Hold on.Instead of pushing them off, listen. We need to pause everything we’re doing, listen, and hear what they have to say. As we reinforce them by making them the priority, they will gain the confidence to speak up more. If they’re going to be world changers, they need to have the confidence to speak up and say what they think.Then we can take it a step further and ask them what they think.How do you think we can teach our children to be world changers?

9/4/15 9/4/15

Family Fridays #6

It's that time of the week again! Family Fridays! Today, Jocelyn from Speaking Of China is sharing one of her family recipes with us.

I grew up in a very white, very middle-class suburb of Cleveland, Ohio – and the last thing I ever expected was to end up in China, married to a guy from Hangzhou. Yet now that I’m here, I can’t imagine things any other way, especially since I’ve learned so much from my husband’s mother about how to prepare amazing and authentic Chinese food. (Thank goodness I married a guy with an amazing cook for a mom!)One of the coolest things about my mother-in-law is that she’s totally accepting of my vegan lifestyle. I never expected that a woman who grew up in Hangzhou’s mountainous countryside – where people tend to be pretty traditional when it comes to food – would embrace my dietary needs. But she does. Maybe it’s because the two of us have really bonded over food. I love asking her about her secrets for, say, crispy tofu or spicy pickled daikon radish. But when I discovered that one of the local snack foods was shaobing, a fried flatbread stuffed with savory salted veggies and then pan-fried until crispy, I knew I had to learn how to make it myself!Most shaobing include bacon-like bits of fatty pork, making the food typically off-limits to vegans like me. But thanks to my mother-in-law, I’ve learned an amazing recipe for vegan shaobing. It’s even a little reminiscent of pizza back from home, so much so that I often jokingly call it “Chinese pizza”.

Vegan-Style Chinese Shaobing (Stuffed Flatbread)Ingredients:FlourWaterSaltOnionsA salted, pickled, smoked or dried vegetable of your choice (My mother-in-law uses salted bamboo; pickled mustard tubers also work well.)Cold-pressed canola oil (or other oil of choice)Directions:Mince the onions and your salted vegetable of choice. Then mix them together with a spoonful or two of oil. (They should not be too oily – just enough to bind them together.) If the mixture is not salty enough for you, add salt to taste. (Note: There should be a half-half mixture of the onions and the salted veggie.)Pour flour into a bowl and add in just enough water to make dough that you can knead without having it stick to your hands. On a cutting board surface, knead the dough until it is elastic, shiny, smooth and without lumps.Roll the dough into a roll with a diameter of about four inches. Then, at about two-inch intervals, cut the dough with a knife into rounds.Cradle the rounds in the palm of your hand, and using your fingers create a bowl-like crater. (Note: don’t make this too thin – the edges should still be around a half-inch thick.) Stuff it with the vegetable mix, then pull the edges of the dough over the top to seal it inside.Place the stuffed rounds on a floured surface. Using your hand, press down first in the center of the dough, then out to the edges. Keep flipping it over and repeating this process, making sure to shape it into a circle, until it’s thin enough to roll out.Using a rolling pin, roll the dough from the center to the edges applying medium pressure. Flip it over and repeat. Keep flipping and rolling out the round until the edges are very thin. (Note: the vegetable filling may occasionally poke holes through the round; this is expected with this type of flatbread and doesn’t affect the final product.)Heat a spoonful of oil in a non-stick pan or wok over medium heat. Add the flatbread, cooking it until it no longer sticks to the pan and is crispy and slightly browned (about 1 and a half to two minutes.) Flip and repeat for other side.Once done, cut the flatbread into four pieces and serve immediately.Connect with Jocelyn on Facebook and Twitter!If you would like to share a recipe, please check out my submission page for more information.

9/3/15 9/3/15

Meat Curry Recipe

Who's ready for a new recipe?! Today, I'm sharing showing you all how to make a simple meat curry over at Mixed Root's Stories. Meat curry is one of those recipes that are delicious no matter what you do to it. You can just do meat or you can add in some vegetables. Check out my simple meat curry recipe and feel free to make it your own by adding in your favorite vegetables. Joel even shared one of his memories of him eating meat curry in Hyderabad, India. “Every time I would visit Ummamma and Thathya in India I would go out and get fresh spices for the meals. Outside of the bungalow they were staying in, there was a chinta chiguru plant (tamarind plant). When it would blossom the kids and I would climb the tree and each gather an arm full of the tamarind plant. We would rush it back to Ummamma and she would make the best chinta chiguru mamsam. To this day it is still one of my favorite recipes.”Chinta chiguru mamsam is a fancy meat curry. Today I want to show you all a basic meat curry that is just a delicious!Read more here.

8/25/15 8/25/15

How Can We Teach Biracial Children To Be Proud Of Their Culture?

(I couldn't help the throwback picture. Look how little they were!)

I'm very excited about today's post. Over at Mixed Root's Stories, I'm discussing how we can teach our kids to be proud of their cultures.We are raising children in an interesting time. Intercultural relationships are on the rise and becoming much more normal in every day society. This means that we are going to start seeing a lot more biracial children. Biracial children are extremely blessed to have multiple cultures in their lives. However, if we're not careful, their unique heritage can become something negative to them. I've seen biracial kids shy away from talking about their parent's ethnicities because they want to be seen as the same as their friends, not someone with a blend of races. In my article, I discuss a few ways we can teach biracial kids to be proud of their cultures. Check it out here and let me know what you think.

What is a good way to teach biracial children to be proud of their culture?

7/26/15 7/26/15

A Fun Filled Week With Dad

My husband has been home for a while, but ended up leaving today. We tried to pack the week full of some fun adventures before he left and a little bit of procrastinating the practical. Our new home has definitely been keeping us busy. We're still unpacking and trying to make the house feel like home. I wake up every morning, make my iced coffee, and I attempt to unpack the rest of the boxes. Then, it happens. It's different every day, but the end game is the same. The boys start arguing, someone gets hurt after wrestling, someone is starving... I'm starting to think I should give up and stop trying to unpack the last few boxes. Maybe they can be some sort of decoration... That seems logical..Look at those faces. You can't even be mad at them. Even after the two on the left take advantage of the one on the right... putting tattoos on his forehead. All I could do was laugh hysterically. Even Lucas thought it was pretty funny. Liam has also been getting ready for his birthday party. He even decided to write a list of things he wants.. Then he got distracted and ended up drawing Toothless instead. We have a few birthday parties under our belts and the same thing always happens. We bounce around themes at least three or four times. The first theme for Liam's party was The Avengers and now it's Angry Birds. Angry Birds seems like a lot more fun to me. We even decided to make a life size Angry Bird's Game out of moving boxes. Seeing as we just moved, there won't be a lot of kids, but what adult doesn't want to play a life sized version of Angry Birds. The boys decided to go swimming when Liam was done. The weather here is... wow... so stinking hot and humid. I don't know if we will ever get used to it. Then we ended our week by letting the kids drive to the park. I'm pretty sure everyone that drove by stopped to smile at these little guys! I also realized we're in big trouble when Liam gets his license! If you liked this post and want to hear more about our family, sign up to join my email list :)

6/10/15 6/10/15

Piano Lessons For Liam And I!

When my husband and I got married we made a plan. No kids for at least four to five years. Done deal right? I mean how hard is it to wait to have kids… Well, we are going to hit out six year anniversary this year…and…we have three kids under four. We were serious about our plan for about five minutes than realized how much we wanted to have kids.

I love my boys. I love watching them as they learn new things and develop new passions. I also feel a strong responsibility to help them cultivate those passions and learn how to harness their skills.

My husband and I will sit down sometimes and discuss what we want for our kids. One thing we’ve always said is that we want them to be passionate about music. My kids LOVE music. They will dance to every song on the radio, sing along to Elsa, and beg me to turn up the soundtrack to all of their shows! I never had to teach them to love music, they were born with a love for it!

Now, it’s our job to cultivate that love. We decided piano would be a great start. Piano teaches so many core foundations to music. We’ve looked around at different options. Most of them were way too expensive or required us to go somewhere multiple times a week. None of that will work with my husband’s travel schedule. He is gone a lot traveling for work and it’s hard for me to take all three kids out alone.

Recently, I was introduced to Hoffman Academy. It is a fantastic company that allows you to learn piano from your very own home! I don’t know if you have a busy schedule or are tied to the house like we are, but if you are this company is for YOU.

Hoffman Academy provides step by step videos, easy to follow lessons, and music to practice with. The lessons have fun activities and ways to practice. The videos are great because Mr. Hoffman makes it fun!

One of my favorite things about their lessons is the fact that my son and I can do it together. He’s three! He loves the activities in the lessons and also loves that we’re doing it together! The lessons are easy to follow for both of us. I’ve dabbled with lessons before and he’s never tried.

The lessons are really short! This was great because my son didn’t lose focus! These lessons held his attention the whole time. He asked me to play his “game” everyday! He was able to practice his colors and letters as well!

In addition to the activities, the lessons provide tips. They tell you how to sit, how to hold your hands, and how to make it fun. You never have to figure it out for yourself, it’s all explained clearly in the material.

If you’re interested in learning piano or if you want to get your kiddo lessons, Hoffman Academy is definitely the place to go.

If you liked this post and want to hear more about our experiences in two cultures, please sign up for our weekly updates!

6/2/15 6/2/15

Our Week In Pictures #3

If you follow me on Instagram, Twitter, or Facebook you already knew my family and I recently took a road trip to California. We used to live there and have friends and family in the area. Joel had to go for work and the boys and I decided to tag along. We decided to drive there, thinking a road trip could be fun….

At one point, I sat there listening to the symphony of screaming children in the backseat, contemplating why in the world I thought a road trip with three kids under four was a good idea.

Then it finally got quiet. Joel and I were scared to move, just in case it broke the trance our kids were in. They were glued to the movie that was playing, while strapped into their carseats, unable to reach each other to fight. I quickly started to see the benefits of a family road trip. The strapped in, buckled up, nowhere to go, can’t get into anything part of it, of course.

When we finally got there, thirteen hours later… we had a great time! We were able to spend time with my family and see some of our friends.

5/28/15 5/28/15

Family Fridays #2 Drumstick Sambhar

(To hear more from Alexandra, check out her blog!)This sambhar is my husband's favorite and one of the classic comfort-food recipes for any Indian wife. It has a perfect amount of vegetable, protein from the dal, and spice. There is no chilli powder and not much oil in it, which makes it a versatile dish. It is very popular in South India and you can get it at any restaurant, or as Indians say "hotel"! Plus, it's a sure way to any South Indian man's heart!

Ingredients:

- 1 cup toor dal

- 2 cups water

- 8-10 pearl onions, whole

- 2 drumsticks (mulakkada)

- 1 carrot

- 1/2 tsp turmeric

- 1/2 tsp salt

- 2 tbsp sambhar powder

- 1/2 cilantro

Tempering ingredients:

- 1 tbsp oil (peanut or sunflower)

- 1 tsp mustard seeds

- 1 tsp cumin

- 2 dashes asefotida

- 10-15 fresh curry leaves

Directions:

Wash dal, drain it, and put it in the pressure cooker along with 2 cups of water.

Take the skin off the pearl onions and add them whole into the pressure cooker.

Peel the carrot. Chop the drumsticks and carrot in half, and then cut to finger-length size pieces. Add to pressure cooker.

Add the turmeric, salt and sambhar powder to the pressure cooker.

Pressure cooker for 8-10 mins, then turn off and let it cool down.

Open up the pressure cooker and add 1-2 cups of water and bring it to a boil.

Add 1/2 cup cilantro to the boil.

When it gets to the perfect consistency, start the tempering.

For the tempering, in a small omelette pan, pour 1 tbsp oil over medium heat.

Add the mustard seeds and let it crackle.

Once the mustard seeds crackle, add the asefoetida and cumin.

When the cumin starts to brown, add the fresh curry leaves and saute for 10 seconds.

Then pour in the tempering into the boiling sambhar, mix and turn off.

This sambhar is great along with idly, dosa, over rice, or as a soup.

Don't forget to check out our very first Family Friday post!

5/25/15 5/25/15

Road Trips And Toddlers

If you follow me on Facebook or Instagram, you've seen that we're currently on a family road trip! We drove about thirteen hours to California. My husband had a work trip so we decided to tag along. What's better than a road trip with toddlers?Before kids, I thought road trips were amazing. My husband and I even took one for him to meet my family while we were dating. It was so much fun! We didn't have a care in the world. We would stop for coffee and food breaks and then drive for hours without stopping. We even listened to a few audiobooks. It was great. Then we had kids....and we were introduced to toddler road trips.Now toddler road trips are... long. Here are a few things not to do when on a road trip with three kids under four. Expect to get more than four hours into an audiobook.. Even if it's a thirteen hour car ride. Your children will bother you every five minutes and yell your name. MOM!!!!! When you finally take a deep breath and answer, they will have nothing to say. Instead you will need to rewind your audiobook for the twentieth time. Expect your children to pee during designated potty breaks. You will ask them to try and go to the bathroom. Then through tears, they will sit down, "try," and tell you they can't go. You give in and start driving again. Thirty minutes later your toddler will start melting down and you'll need to pull over in the tiniest town possible. Think you can actually take a nap while your spouse drives. The second you close your eyes, your previously occupied children will start yelling. Mom! Mom, why are you sleeping! I need to tell you something! It won't ever be an important fact, but they will act like it's life or death. Go out and buy a ton of snacks for your children the day before your trip. Save yourself fifty dollars and buy goldfish because they won't touch the trail mix or fruit anyways. Arrive to your destination and think you can relax. Instead your two year old will strip naked, poop on the hotel floor, and get poop all over your bed....Road trips with kids are much different than road tripping alone. However, if you have to do it, you better do it with cute kiddos like these!