Creating Healthy Boundaries In An Interracial Relationship
How To Create Healthy Boundaries In An Interracial Relationship
As a little girl, I used to sit at the coffee table with my mom. We would be there for what felt like was hours just coloring pictures. I remember looking at her and thinking what an amazing artist she was, being able to color in the lines so well and draw pieces of candy.It seems so little now. The fact that my mom could draw a piece of candy so well. As a child, I just remember staring at her pictures in pure awe. I loved the fact that she would take her crayon and trace the lines of the picture first. Then she would color inside the lines lightly.It was perfect.She knew how to perfectly stay within the lines, the right amount of pressure to use, and what colors went well together.
It makes me smile, thinking back to that little memory.
It brought me so much joy as a little kid sitting with my mom and coloring for hours. Now, I realize what a beautiful lesson she taught me through coloring at the coffee table with her. She showed me how amazing a picture could be if you color inside the lines and clearly identify where the boundaries are.Sure, I may not be a killer artist or be creating glamorous pieces of art, but I am using this lesson every day.
She taught me what it means to make boundaries.
Boundaries aren't always easy. In fact, creating boundaries can be freaking hard, am I right? Have you ever been in a situation where you need to create a firm boundary within a relationship or friendship and found yourself scared?It's not easy to draw lines in the sand. However, it creates something beautiful.Creating boundaries within our relationships helps us work towards a healthy relationship.
As we experience life as an interracial couple, we quickly start to realize how important boundaries are.
Situations come up, and we have to learn how to safeguard ourselves, making sure we allow things in our lives that are good for us.We may be facing a decision on whether or not to let our in-laws move in with us.We may be trying to decide which family members to move next to.We may be looking at how much we will let in our family members.We may be deciding how we let people talk to us.Whatever the reason is, we need these healthy boundaries.
These boundaries hold us accountable to make sure we have a healthy relationship or are working towards one. They help us individually and as an interracial couple.
Individually, we know where our lines in the sand are, and we are able to actually stick to them. Or at least do our very best. As an interracial couple, we can hold each other accountable to these boundaries.
Boundaries are hard to stick to.
We will have times where we feel too weak, or the pressure will get to us. These boundaries aren't created to make us live in a legalistic lifestyle. They're designed to show us guidelines and try to keep us within healthy limits. They're meant to encourage us and motivate us to always work towards healthy relationships with ourselves and with our partners.What is a healthy boundary you need to make today?