How Do I Introduce My Family To My Husband/Boyfriend's Culture?

How do i introduce my family to my boyfriend's culture

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Dear Almost Indian Wife. I've been seeing my boyfriend for a little over two years. We just got engaged! I can't wait to marry this man , but one things is scaring me. I came into this relationship knowing I would have to learn about a brand new culture. Now that we're getting married, I've realized my family has to as well. He's not just marrying me, he's marrying my family. His family is coming to town for our engagement party and the nalugu. Our families are going to meet for the first time. I'm so scared my family is going to say the wrong thing or not embrace the culture. Please help! What do I do?

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Introducing My Family To My Spouse's Culture

How Do I Introduce My Family To My Boyfriend or Husband's Culture?

When my husband and I were dating, things felt easy. It wasn't so much about blending cultures as it was getting to know each other. My boyfriend (now husband) would come over to my parent's house all the time. They loved him and it didn't feel difficult for them to embrace him.I did notice a shift when we got engaged. My family was still over the moon about my relationship, BUT we officially got introduced to blending cultures. It wasn't about getting to know each other any more. Now, it was about introducing everyone to blending cultures.We decided to have a fusion wedding.This meant, both sides of our family had to get a heavy duty dose of what it meant to be in an interracial relationship.Why is the ceremony so long?Why are you getting a necklace with a string dipped in turmeric?Why are all the Indians LATE?What kind of music is this?Why are your bridesmaids wearing American dresses?Both sides of our families had SO MANY questions. It was hard to blend cultures and make everyone happy. I felt a lot of pressure on my shoulders to teach my family about East Indian culture and I know my husband did as well.Looking back at this almost 11 years later, my husband and I have learned a few things. We've learned how to introduce our family to new traditions and a new way of doing things. Let's be honest, it's not always easy. In fact, it's been difficult. However, it's worth it!Here are few things my husband and I have learned about introducing your family to a new culture.

Open Dialogue

One of the most important things you need to do is create open dialogue between everyone. Both sides of the family need to know they can come to you and your fiancé with any questions they may have. Your families are going to be curious. They need to feel comfortable asking you about things they see or want to know more about. The more they talk with you the more comfortable they'll all feel.

Give Them Grace

Remember how new this is for everyone. Even though you two may have been together for a while, this is the first time your families have to encounter what it's like to blend cultures. When you first get together with your partner, you're focused on how you will blend cultures.When you get into a long term relationship with someone, all of your families will encounter situations where blending cultures is necessary. Be sure to give them grace as they figure out how to do it. There's going to be a situation where someone unintentionally says the wrong thing. That's ok. It usually happens because they don't realize what they're saying is wrong. Give each other a lot of grace.

Prepare Both Sides Of The Family

Before everyone get's together you need to have a little sit down. You can sit down with your family and let him sit down with his. If your families are comfortable with both of you, do it as a couple. Then talk about a few cultural traditions they're going to see when everyone gets together. Remember, even if it's become normal for you, it's not for them.

Remember You Have Time

None of this has to get figured out overnight. It's going to take time for your families to feel comfortable with each other and a new culture. Let it happen naturally so they can develop a good relationship with each other. It's easier if your families live close to each other, but that's not always the case. One problem that can arise is putting too much pressure on your families during the short amount of times they're together. Give it time.