6 Reasons Little Kids Test Boundaries
The moment the doctor tells you, "You're having another boy," you know things are about to get a little crazy.
Oh, and it definitely did. I have three boys, under five years old. As they get older, our stories about our day to day lives get more interesting.If you follow me on Instagram or Twitter, you've gotten to know my little family.You will definitely know my son Levi. I'm always posting pictures of his little mischievous antics. He's a riot. His nick name is Leviathan and if you were around him for any length of time, you'd understand. All of our crazy parenting stories involve him.
He greets people at our house half naked (Let me assure you I dress him about 15 times a day, but he always manages to "lose" his clothes).
He is always under the table with some contraband item (candy usually).
He randomly changes your name for an entire day (yesterday I was Queen Mommy).
He decides on a whim to cut our dogs hair.
He even wakes up at 5am to get a head start on it all.
It's because of him that I drink three cups of coffee a day. I have to keep up with him somehow! As he's getting bigger, I'm learning more about his character. Everyone always sees his mischievous and silly side, but people forget that their is so much more to him.People tend to think he needs us to raise our voice and be firm with him. They've told us he needs tough love and no grace. They make comments in front of him about how naughty he is. They tell us we're not parenting him right.What they don't see is that same little boy come up to me later that night and ask me to call him a good boy. While, you may think it's nothing, it is. He wants me to reaffirm that I love him and that I don't think he's a bad boy.There are so many rowdy little boys like mine in the world. Instead of understanding who they are, people label them the trouble makers or tell their parents they need to be put on ADD medication.Today I want to challenge all of you out there. Whether you're a parent or not. The next time you see a rowdy little boy, do not label him. Don't tell him he's bad because he wants to explore the world with his hands and push limits.
While you think he's disrespectful, he's learning what to say.
While you think he gets into everything, he's learning limits in his environment.
While you think he's can handle your "firm" words, he comes to mommy crying.
While you think he's being mean to his baby brother, he was trying to give him a big kiss.
While you think he's rude for not wanting to hug you, he is learning about his own emotions.
While you think he doesn't listen, he hears every word.
While you see some of the naughty things they do, you don't always know what they're trying to do. Instead of being tougher on them, figure out how you can help.I wish people would try to teach kids what they could do rather than what not to do. Yelling "NO" at a child doesn't teach him. Instead, teach him how to do it better.Kids need to be allowed to explore their environment and figure out how the world works. This means they will fail. They will cross the line. they will do it wrong. It's your job as the parent to teach them those limits.Children understand so much more if you encourage them to explore and set clear limits. Labeling a child as the "bad kid" will prevent them from being able to express themselves, learn about the world, have any self confidence, or want to learn how to do things differently. Encourage your children rather than label them.
Is Comparison Destroying Your Family
While I was growing up, I constantly found myself looking at my friends and wishing I had what they had. It didn't matter what it was, I just wanted it. I wanted to have a traditional family like them, I wanted clothes like them, I wanted to be like them... My friend's lives always seemed better than mine.You'd think I would have grown out of this as I got older, but no. I was always jealous of certain people in my life. In high school, it was the girls with the perfect family life. As an adult, it was people with the perfect marriage.It never stops.
2 Ways Comparison Destroys Your Family
Comparison stays with you like a cancer. It grows as you grow and starts to infiltrate different parts of your life. If you don't take care of it early on in life, it even attaches itself to your family. Then you have to watch something that's plagued you for so long, affect your marriage and children.
Teaches Your Family They're Never Enough
If you and your family constantly compare yourselves to other families, you'll start to believe you're not enough. You'll always see yourself as second best. All of it starts to bleed into your self-confidence.As a mom, you stop enjoying the little things that make your family unique and set apart from others. You spend so much time trying to mimic other "perfect families" that you lose sight of how beautiful yours already is.
Slowly Makes You Resent The People You're Comparing Yourselves To
The longer you compare yourself to other people around them, the more you start to resent them. They go from a "perfect family" you envy to a family you resent. You start to resent how seemingly perfect they are, everything that makes them threat way in your mind, and it destroys your friendship with them.Comparison may look like it's motivating .you at first, but it always leads to resentment and never feeling content with your own life.Every family is unique and has their own family culture. If you look at the families around you, you'll start to see just how different they all are. Maybe your family shares a big passion for the outdoors, maybe you like to reach out to your community, maybe you like to travel, or maybe you love cooking together.Instead of trying to conform to this picture perfect image of what you should look like or what your family should look like, try letting it all go. Let it go and celebrate what makes you different.Break down those comparisons by remembering no one is perfect. The families you admire for being everything you're not is probably a lie. They have their own problems and are most likely struggling by comparing themselves to someone as well.Stop comparing yourself to other people today. Celebrate what makes you who you are. Teach your kids to celebrate their special qualities now. Watch your family thrive as they stop trying to be something they're not.
Do you struggle with comparison? What have you done to try and overcome it?
The Chaos Of Going From Two To Three Kids
People joke all the time how motherhood is a full-time job, but they're wrong. It's not just a full-time job. It's two full-time jobs, with no break, no holiday pay, and constant over time. This job doesn't have a training period, you're simply thrust into it the day your child is born and you're left to figure it all out as you go.I have three boys. Three.
You'd think I'd have it all figured out by now, but I'm not even close.
I'm still figuring things out! My kids didn't want it to be too easy for me, so they decided to have completely different personalities and present me with different challenges every day.You have my oldest who is the rule follower. He wants to be perfect. It doesn't matter how often I tell him that it's impossible to be perfect and you learn the best through failure. It's ingrained into who he is. He pushes himself so hard and I'm still trying to figure out how to teach him to give himself a break and enjoy the journey.Then you have my middle child. He's full of endless energy, have no impulse control, and loves figuring things out for himself. This typically ends up in broken things around the house, situations I can hardly explain to anyone because they think I'm making it up for a laugh, and constantly asking, "Where's Levi?"Last, but not least, you have my youngest. He's the most dangerous combination of them both and he puts his own sassy spin on it all. He knows he has to hold his own as the youngest, so he never goes down without a fight. He also has two big brothers to learn his trickery from!Together, they're like a Power Ranger (see you can even tell I'm a boy mom through my references!) They combine together to become a super force and love trying to take me on every day.Aww. They're cute. They can't be that crazy can they??
Let's give you a little snapshot of my day yesterday.
I walked into the bathroom to see they forgot to flush for the millionth time. Not only did they forget to flush, but there was toilet paper all over the floor, soap all over the sink, and a full sink of soapy water. When I asked them about it (aka yelled at them for making such a mess) they quickly reminded me that they're magicians and had to make a potion.Over the next hour, things got crazier so I decided to take them to Chick Fil A so I could get a break. Plus it means they're playing in a room with one door in and out. It makes it much easier to keep tabs on them. I finally sat down with my coffee and peaked in to make sure they weren't destroying anything. What did I see? A pile of my kid's clothes. On the ground. Levi was completely out of sight. I ran in to find him before anyone else say my naked child running around and it turns out he had a costume on..... What!? He had apparently worn a costume under his clothes so he could "show his friends" his fun Ninjago costume. The mom in there looked at me like I was crazy, but I didn't care. I was just happy he wasn't naked. Costumes I can handle, naked tushies are a different story!You guys, this was just my morning!Three boys are no joke. Two boys were a little bit easier because I had enough arms to maneuver them when need be. Three kids mean I have to legitimately use my entire body to block them from all running off.
How has your life changed after welcoming another kiddo into your family?
How To Love Your Kids According To Their Love Language
Have you and one of your kids ever just been in a funk?Maybe it's one of those days you just can't get along? No matter what you do, it ends up in a fight or one of you crying...I thought I had a few years until this happened, but I'm quickly learning how wrong I was. My oldest and I have very similar personalities. We're both the oldest in our families, rule followers, and feel things very deeply. When he's upset I typically know just what to do. I know how to comfort him because I try and think about what would work for me.This week it's not working.I've tried everything! Nothing's working. Instead, it's causing us to fight nonstop. I can tell he's completely overwhelmed. It's causing him to have a teenager-level bad attitude, cry over everything, and hide out on his own.You guys... I'm over it! I hate not knowing how to help him and trying to talk to a kid who is completely annoyed before I start talking is... fun to say the least. Not to mention, it's putting me in a bad mood! I just want to have a good time with my kids and instead, I'm getting on him for his attitude all day long.Then it finally hit me. He didn't want alone time. He didn't want a break from me. He didn't want to play with friends.
He simply wanted alone time with his momma.
I completely forgot that daddy usually takes him out to practice alone each week. They drive to sports practice, then hit something to eat on the way home, and drive thirty minutes home alone. That's a lot of quality time and it fills his little heart for the whole week.Joel is out of town this week and Liam hasn't been able to have alone time with mommy or daddy. He's craving it. He has three brothers and he's at school all day. He needs that quality one on one time to have the strength to get through anything that comes his way during the week.It's really hard to find a balance and give all three kids alone time. I tend to take them all with me for everything so things are "even." I grew up thinking things had to be even for everyone for it to be fair. Well, guess what... Kids don't need even. Kids don't need things to be fair.
They need their little hearts to be filled each week and that happens differently for all of them.
You may have a kiddo who thrives on quality time and another who feels loved getting little gifts. Find out your children's love language and make sure you love them how they need to be loved.
This week Liam was in desperate need of some one on one time for me to love on him. We went to Starbucks for a mommy-son work date. We started the day fighting and Liam ended up in at least a dozen crying fits. By the end of our momma date, he was hugging me with the biggest smile he has. It was something so simple. He didn't want anything big.
He just needed time.
This year I want to do better at loving my kids. I know I love them all with all of my heart, but I want to love them better. I want to love them intentionally every day. I want to find more ways throughout the day to show them what they mean to me.
Find Your Child's Love Language
Quality Time
Does you child love to spend time with you? Would they choose to just cozy up on the couch and watch a movie over just about anything? Do they constantly ask to do things with you? If this sounds like your child, they may have quality time as their love language.Fill their little love tank by asking them to do things with you. Prioritize time with them because it means more than you realize to their hearts.
Words Of Affirmation
Does your child feel words deeply? Whether they're positive or negative, do they hold on to them? If so they may feel love the deepest through word of affirmation.Fill their love tanks by telling them how much you love them. Take the time to write them little love notes and send them in their lunch box. Make sure you tell them how much you love them every day. They need to hear it daily to feel how much you care about them.
Acts Of Service
Does your child love when you do things for them? They may value their independence, but then love when you come in and help them with their homework. If this sounds like your child, they may be acts of service.Fill their love tank by helping them with a project, teach them to do something, or even cook together. Find ways to serve your kiddo and let them know how much you love them.
Gifts
Do gifts just send your kid to the moon? Do they hold onto those little trinkets forever? If gifts mean a lot to them it could also be their love language.Fill their love tank by getting them little gifts. They don't have to be big or expensive. Even a simple little card will mean something for them. It shows them that you thought about them enough to choose something special just for them.
Physical Touch
When your child is upset, do they go to your for comfort through hugs and cuddles? Do they need you to reassure them by holding their hand or giving them a pat on the back? If so your kid's love language could be physical touch.Fill their love tank by giving them a hug, wrestle with them, teach them how to dance, snuggle up on the couch, or give them a piggy back ride!
What are your kid's love languages?
A Glimpse Into Our Fusion Life
This shop/post has been compensated by Collective Bias, INC. and The Coca-Cola Company, all opinions are mine alone. #FlavorsForYourMood #CollectiveBias
Over the past few months, I've been asking you guys what you want to see more of on the blog. The one thing I keep hearing is you want to get a bigger glimpse into our lives! If you follow me on Instagram, you get to get a glimpse of our crazy every day!Today, I'm making it happen for you! I'm taking you through a day in our wild, fusion lives! Hopefully, you still like us just as much after you see the nitty gritty of our days!!Morning times in our house come earlier every day. My kids are morning people, to say the least. I used to think I was a morning person, but then I had to start waking up at 6:30 to take my oldest to school every day.Every morning I tell myself I'll wake up at 6 and make a big breakfast for the kids. Then every morning I sleep in until the last possible second and drag myself out of bed.
Then we're off to the school drop off line. The line full of overachieving parents trying to battle to see who can drop off their kids first. I never thought I'd be a part of that group of parents until my son told me he had to get to school early every day so he could get a "ball chair."As most of you know, I desperately want to remain cool in his eyes as long as I can so I do it. I drag my kids out of the house before the sun comes up so that he remembers how amazing I am for a few more years.After big brother gets dropped off in the mornings, we come home, I fill up a large glass of cold brew coffee and homeschool starts for the little kids. Homeschool only lasts about an hour since most of it is fun activities and reading! When the kids get done, they go play and momma gets some housework done. Or I stare at the laundry piling up until the kids go down for a nap.
Nap time for the little kids means one thing. Work time for me!Work time in mom life usually means I grab my laptop and find a place free of toys and clutter. It's almost impossible to find this place in our house, but I somehow manage it and it means a bit of alone time. I turn on some music and get all my thoughts out on the blog.
If momma is really on her A-game, it even means gym time! My husband and I usually meet up at the gym in the afternoons to hit yoga together. I don't know how I convinced him to do yoga with me, but we both love it. It's way more of a workout than we imagined!I think I'm a little biased too because somehow Joel gets called out during all of our yoga classes by the teacher and it makes the class absolutely amazing. It's hilarious because he hates it so much, but can see the results from yoga!After yoga completely kicks our butts, we go home and whip up a delicious dinner. We're still working on our Whole 30 diet so we have to get a little creative in the kitchen. We have to find something that hits the spot for our Indian food craving, but also needs to be no carb, dairy, or sugar.
Don't worry we have fun trying out new fusion dishes! It also goes really bad sometimes.. Like really bad. We found a recipe for paleo naan. I jumped at it right away because I've been missing carbs like crazy! I spent an hour getting it ready and making sure it fits within our Whole 30 guidelines. Then I took it off the griddle to try a bite.Horrible. Disgusting. Never again.Luckily most of our dishes have been amazing! Don't worry, we'll never try paleo naan again. We'll stick the the good stuff!
Sometimes we get to finish the week off strong by heading over to our local Indian church. We already attend a church nearby, but we try to visit the Indian church when we can. It's a fun way to get to know the Indian community around us and it's a great excuse to get all dressed up in our Indian clothes!It also means we get to be thrown into Indian culture even more!
Throughout all the business of our day, one thing can get you through it all! A can of the amazing Diet Coke® fusion flavors! They're delicious and they have four new flavors to fit every mood you're in! I don't know about you, but my mood changes all day long! Whether I'm waiting in the school pick up line or I see what my three year old has decided to do with the brand new bag of flour all over my kitchen...I need a drink that can fit them all! In addition to their regular Diet Coke, they now have Diet Coke Fiesty Cherry, Diet Coke Twisted Mango, Diet Coke Zesty Blood Orange, and Diet Coke Ginger Lime. My favorite is the Ginger Lime! It's a delicious fusion drink, perfect for our multiracial family! They're the perfect drink to have coming off of Whole 30 too! They have zero calories and zero sugar!!
Not sure what drink to try? Head over to Diet Coke's website! They have a super fun way to find the flavor that fits your mood perfectly! All you need to do is scan your fingerprint and the perfect flavor for you will pop up! Share your flavor with your friends and you can even get an online coupon to buy (1) 12 oz. sleek can, get (1) free at Walgreens!
Head over to Walgreens today and pick up a new flavor to try! It doesn't matter what mood you're in, they have the perfect bold flavor for you!
How We're Getting Through Whole 30
We are officially on day ten of Whole 30!Before this month, ten days didn't feel like a long time. It's a little over a week and no time at all, right?Wrong!When all good food is stripped away from you, ten days is a freaking long time! Ten days of no carbs, no sugar, and no dairy. Ten days of no iced caramel macchiatos or late night sugar binges. Ten days hiding from the Girl Scouts because you know you have no self-control when it comes to cookies.Trust me. It's a very long time when you're on Whole 30.Laughs aside, I feel like Whole 30 is actually getting a bit easier. The first couple days were tough. I got headaches from detoxing, my body was sore, and I was just tired. Granted the fatigue was probably because I used to live on cold brew coffee all day long and I switched to a cup a day.Once I got past the detoxing symptoms, I started to feel a lot more motivation.
Tip #1 Prep Everything!
At the beginning of the week, I sat down and planned out my entire week for lunches, snacks, and dinners. Then I prepped. I looked at everything I would need throughout the week and if I could prepare anything beforehand I did!One of the hardest parts of eating healthy for myself is how long everything takes. It's like my brother likes to complain, now that he lives with a family doing Whole 30. He goes to the fridge and pantry and says, "There's nothing to eat!" Even though their both full, everything requires work and the actual meals aren't always quick.Sometimes, I just don't have the time to take an hour to make a meal. Prepping beforehand has helped cut the time down a lot! I even preportioned snacks and had ready-made lunches in the fridge. It made it possible for Joel and I to just reach in and grab something when we needed to be out and about for the day.
Tip #2 Mix It Up
Doing Whole 30 has caused us to use quite a few new items. Before this, I've never used coconut aminos, tapioca flour, or even tried cashew butter.The easy option is to stick with the basics. Whip up meat and veggies for all of your meals and you're good to go.Wrong.We did that for a bit and boy did we get sick of it. We missed having sauces to slather our main course in and variety. Eating the same thing every day becomes way too much to deal with. Especially if you're already having a hard day eating healthy and want nothing more than to go to the new gourmet cinnamon roll place that opened up just ten minutes from your house. (I swear they only opened it to taunt me this month!)Be sure to mix things up. Instead of making the same thing for lunches all week, give yourself two options. Or you can grill up some chicken and use it differently each day.Give yourself options so you don't go crazy! I've been obsessed with the Against All Grain cookbook too. Her recipes are paleo but you can do most of them on Whole 30.
Tip #3 Bring Your Own Snacks
Life hasn't stopped just because we're doing Whole 30. Our schedules and lives are still the same. This means we're still super busy and we still go out on date nights.Date nights used to mean a tasty dinner and a movie. As we were thinking about our date night last week, we almost canceled. We had been dying to go and see Black Panther because I mean come on. Best movie of the year!All I could think about was smelling movie popcorn and watching everyone eat candy the whole time. Yes, I'm a recovering junk food addict.We couldn't wait to see the movie, so we bought tickets and decided to figure out the rest later.I knew I would be tempted to cheat on our diet if I didn't bring any snacks. I had to have something to snack on during the movie. I packed up sliced fruit, almonds, lara bars, and water with essential oils. We whipped them all out at the beginning of the movie and I was surprised at how easy it was.I think our bodies are getting used to those things rather than having sugar and junk. The fruit was sweet to it fully satisfied my sweet tooth and the almonds satisfied my junk food craving. The water... well the water just tricked me into thinking it was a really good movie drink.
Tip #4 Make It A Family Affair
One thing that's made the last ten days a bit easier is that our family is doing it. We got rid of all the junk food right before day one and talked with our kids about what this month would look like.They were nervous at first, but then they got excited! We told them we would be eating tasty healthy food and becoming more active as a family.Granted, they're not truly on Whole 30 with us. We still give them bread fillers and aren't strict with their eating at all. Our goal is to get them snacking healthier being willing to try new foods. For example, we may have turkey and sweet potato chili and they'll have chips with it too. We make subtle differences for them, but they love it all the same.The fun part has been going out together as a family. We try to hit a new park or trail each week and the kids are taking it as a challenge! They want to do something new each week so they brainstorm every day with us!
Tip #5 Celebrate All Successes
Whole 30 isn't just a diet for Joel and I. Our hope is that it can teach us to live a healthy lifestyle. After it's over we plan on adding back in a few things in moderation, but for the most part, we want to have our meals consist of meat and veggies.We both like how we feel right now. I feel like I have more energy and I want to teach our kids to live a healthy lifestyle. Not just that, but I want them to know healthy food actually tastes good!The transition from our old eating habits has been the hardest. This is why it's so important to celebrate your success. Whether it's celebrating that we haven't cheated as of day 10 or that we finally feel like we hit our groove with this!The biggest celebration I've had so far is after I looked at the scale today. I've lost a total of five pounds in a little over a week! That's huge for me! I see my post-baby weight melting off because of all my hard work and I couldn't be happier!Joel, on the other hand, has already lost ten! Ten whole pounds. That's a pound a day! Why do guys lose weight so much easier!? Joel can think about losing weight and he'll lose two pounds. I have to work hit the gym every day and cut out all junk from my diet to make any progress!Okay. Okay. Joel has been doing the exact same thing I have. I just have to tease him because I'm jealous. I'll still celebrate with him don't worry!Ten days down, twenty more to go. We can do this! If you want to follow along on our journey, be sure to head over to Instagram and see it all behind the scenes!
Raising Young Men In A Time Of Trump And #MeToo
I'll never forget the moment I held all three of my little boys for the first time. Staring at their beautiful little faces wondering how in the world they could be mind.My boys.Six years later and I still find myself staring at them in the same way. Even after a long day of tantrums, fighting, wild antics, and all. Those wild little boys are mine.When I go to sleep at night, I find myself praying that their dad and I can raise them to be the kind of men this world needs.Men that know the importance of chivalry.Men that always strive to make the world a better place.Men that take care of their family and make them feel safe.Men that look out for people around them.Men that don't contribute to a #MeToo environment but stand alongside others knowing it's time for a change.It's a lot of responsibility to raise young men, especially the men you know they should be. It means we as their mothers have to fight hard now. We need to take every opportunity we can to teach them and surround them with men that lead by example.We have to stand up and fight against the negative examples of men that reflect the very disease in our society that leads to a time of #MeToo.
How can we raise young men with integrity when Trump is the most powerful leader in their country?
He stands for everything I don't want my kids to be. Regardless of your thoughts on politics, he's known for sexualizing women, joking about assaulting them, racist remarks, and promoting violence.He's undoing years of progress made in our country over the last hundred years.As a leader, our kids look up to him. They learn from his actions and words. Yes, even his toxic Twitter account where teens spend most of their time.So what can we do? Are we doomed to ending up with kids like the leader of our very own country?No. Hell no.
It's our job to teach our boys to be set apart.
They don't need to conform to the standard of men society has deemed acceptable. Our boys need to rise above be better.Every mother out there needs to challenge their kids daily. Raise the bar for them.Expect them to be chivalrous and hold doors open for people.Expect them to protect women rather than take advantage.Expect them to behave like young men with integrity and they will rise to the challenge.The time is now. We need to step up and challenge toxic masculinity at every step so our young boys can be the beginning of change. I refuse to raise my boys in the shadow of this example. They need to break through every bad example, every suggestion from our society, and SHINE.They need to learn to be the very examples we hope they find in their lives.
Ways To Simplify The School Week
I’m only a few months into a child at public school and I’m already feeling how crazy it all gets. Our homeschool schedule was completely different. We would wake up when we felt like starting our day, enjoy a good breakfast together, and ease into our school work. Then we were done by lunchtime and ready to have family and friend time!Public school is a whole different ballgame.Bedtime becomes life or death. If my kids don’t lay their heads on their pillow by 7 pm I know the following morning will be horrible. The next morning I have to get the kids up by 6 am, help them put their clothes on while half awake, and then leave the house by 6:45 am.Then you have the drop-off line.. The dreadful and infinitely long drop-off line. I typically spend our time waiting on my Instagram stories, complaining about how long it’s taking.By the time I make it back home, I’m completely exhausted but too wired to fall back asleep. Not to mention my younger two kids are wide awake waiting for their days to begin.I don’t know how all of you have survived it for so long! I count down until the weekends so I can get a bit of extra sleep and sanity. Only to find out my kid's body clocks won’t even let them sleep in!This is exactly why I started asking for advice from my momma friends about one day into our public school adventure. Here are all of the tips they have that help them make it through school mornings with a bit of sanity!
Breakfast Prep
Prepare your breakfast the weekend or night before. We don’t always have time for the kids to sit down at the table and enjoy a bowl of cereal. Sometimes, it’s simply a grab and go morning.Okay, most mornings are grab and go.I like to make hard boiled eggs, masala egg cups, smoothies, homemade granola bars, and samosa hand pies.The more that you can prep beforehand, the less you will need to do on school mornings.
Have Your Child Lay Everything Out The Night Before
Help your child pick out their clothes and school supplies out the night before. This way all they need to do when they wake up is put their clothes on. They don’t have to take the time to stress out over what they’re going to wear. They can simply roll out of bed and get dressed.On their way out the door, they can even grab their backpacks and lunches. No more of the whole looking for the notebook they misplaced the night before. Do all the handwork the night before when you’re not in a time crunch.
Keep The TV Off In The Mornings
If your kids are anything like mine, it can be incredibly hard to pull your kids away from their favorite show. Instead, you can turn off the TV and turn up the music. We have a few playlists that the kids have created and they choose our which ones they want to listen to for that morning. It helps get them moving, but it’s also easy to turn off when we’re done. Or you can even transition it to the car and listen to it on the way to school!
Stick To A Routine
Find a routine that works best for everyone and stick to it. This helps promote independence for your kids because they know exactly what they should be doing. It will be tricky at first because they’ll try to get out of it or pretend they can’t remember what they were supposed to be doing.Once they see your morning routine isn’t going anywhere, they’ll start to do it on their own!
Reward Your Kids For A Good Week
I am a big fan of positive reinforcement. Okay. Okay. I’m a big fan of bribery! I find little ways to reward my kids for good behavior and it helps! Did your kids have a good week? Were they getting ready quickly or did you find this week better than last week?
Reward them!
Let them know you’re proud of their hard work in the mornings and find a way to show them. It can be a special breakfast in the morning, an early trip to Starbucks, or take them to the movie over the weekend. It doesn’t have to be big, just let them know you’ve noticed their hard work.
What are you tips for school mornings?
Whole 30 With A South Asian Flair
One thing I’ve learned from Indian culture is the importance of Indian food. It’s the center of everything. If you go to an event, you already know they’re going to feed you. Not just feed you, but stuff you full of delicious food.Maybe it’s one of the reasons I keep getting pregnant. I have the perfect excuse to let them load up my plate until their hearts are content.It’s given me a new love for food. I love making food for people in my life and seeing that look on their face when it’s turned out perfectly.Or when my husband say’s I make the best chicken wings in the world (sorry Aunt Ca)!It’s become a passion to find and create new tasty recipes. My husband even joins in the fun and has a few new signature dishes our whole family begs for.
Our family loves food.
My four year old has even developed his own little passion for it. He tells us every day that he’s going to become a chef and needs to help us cook for practice.This year I promised him he could start helping me cook more. I want to encourage his passion for cooking and I love the quality time it gives us.However, there is a little problem. This year I also promised myself I would help my family to become healthier together. I promised we would make better food choices and find ways to make delicious healthy food.
My husband is convinced there is no such thing as delicious healthy food!
This is exactly why I was excited when my aunt told me about a 60 Day Challenge our gym was about to have.It’s a challenge to lose weight and get healthy together with a team. In the beginning, you detox your body of all the toxins and unhealthy foods by doing a Whole 30 diet. Then you start to add back in certain foods to see what your body can handle and can’t. It helps you find the perfect foods and diet to continue with after the program. It’s not meant to be a quick fix but a lifestyle change.So… How can this work for a family who loves food? How can we all fulfill our passion for making delicious food all while beginning a new healthy lifestyle?
Sounds like another challenge doesn’t it!?
The good thing is my husband and I like a good challenge. Our program starts February 10th and we have the next two months to show ourselves and all of you that healthy food can be good!What about the kids? You may be thinking the hardest ones to get on board would be the kids, but they love healthy food. They would eat salads and Brussel sprouts all day long if they could.The hard one to convince was my hubby! All you need to do is glance at our plates to see the difference. I pile my plate up with veggies and he gets two or three pieces. Just enough to show the kids he ate it. My plate, on the other hand, is all veggies and a bit of protein.He heard about the program and was skeptical until I said they chose a winner at the end who made the biggest transformation and they could win $1000.Done deal.My husband may be scared of healthy food, but he loves competitions. It’s the best motivator he could find to jump start our healthy lifestyle.Now comes the hard part. I have to show my family how good healthy food really can be!I hope you guys will have fun following us along on our family’s journey. We will give you updates each week to let you see how we do.
Here’s a look at what the first two weeks will look like for us.
Our kids will only be doing part of the Whole 30 with us. My plan for them is to get rid of the junk food, but they’ll still eat bread, beans, and some dairy. I mainly want them to try and fill up on meat and veggies rather than all the fillers.For the first two weeks, Joel and I will eliminate dairy, grains (hubby is still crying over no rice), alcohol, legumes, added sugar, processed food, and any other junk food.Our diets will stick to this schedule as much as we can —> protein shake, snack, salad, snack, high protein meal.We will also be working out 5-6 days a week and then having a day to give our bodies a break. Our gym has some fun classes so we will most likely do those each day. I work better with classes rather than on my own because it’s easier to keep up with other people than figure it out on my own.So far, I’ve been doing yoga and a cycle class. Joel even did yoga with me! He kept giving me “the look” for the first 20 minutes thinking I tricked him into a girl’s class. Then he started sweating and realizing how intense yoga is!Only a few more days until we start and I’m excited to see how it all goes! Keep an eye out for yummy recipes and updates!
My Family's Journey With Essential Oils + Our Favorite Blends
*I am a member of Young Living and receive a small commission on sales. All opinions expressed are my own.*
I’ve never considered myself a crunchy mom. In fact, I didn’t even know what that term meant until I moved to the Pacific Northwest. It was there I was introduced to a world of healthy moms full of vegan, dairy free, organic, sugar-free everything.I thought it was silly to waste all that time and continued on with my sugary coffee and donuts.Then my son had his first febrile seizure. Then my husband and I entered into a crazy season in our family’s life. It was also when I realized a crunchy life really wasn’t so crazy after all. It simply meant moms out there were doing anything in their power to make sure their kids were healthy and happy.I started looking into everything I could. I paid attention to what was in the food I purchased, started making things homemade when I could, and I was introduced to essential oils. I needed to find natural ways to boost my kid’s immune systems so they didn’t pass things along to Luke and cause him to have another seizure.A few years later and we’re still using essential oils. I love how easy they are to use and it’s become a part of our sick routine.The first sign of a cough or a fever and we immediately start diffusing oils, rub oils on our kids back, and start taking them in our water as well.We definitely saw improvements in our health overall. Not to mention, if you’re a candle junky like me, you love having your house smell fresh all the time. It’s exactly why my diffuser has become my best friend.
*I use Young Living Oils in my house so everything you see below is using their products. Also, I am NOT A DOCTOR. These are things we do when our kids get sick and merely a suggestion.*
My Go To Diffuser Blends
Wake Momma Up ( 3 Drops of Lemon + 3 Drops of Peppermint)Sick Days (3 Drops of Purification + 3 Drops Thieves + 2 Drops Lemon)Yucky Smells (3 Drops of Purification)Homework Time (2 Drops of Lavender + 2 Drops of Frankincense + 2 Drops of Stress Away)Bed Time (3 Drops of Lavender)
Our Sick Routine
FeversWe filled a roller bottle with coconut oil and 12 drops of peppermint oil. When our kids get a fever we roll it on their spine. It naturally cools your kid’s bodies.Tummy AcheMix a drop of Digize and coconut oil and rub it on their belly. Young Living also has a kid version of the Digize and that works well too.EczemaMix 2 drops of lavender and coconut oil and rub it on the affected area. It really helps my kids feel better. My kids have mild eczema, but it works for them and the coconut oil is very moisturizing.Don’t Get Sick!Try to stay healthy this season by putting a drop of Thieves oil on your feet in the morning. It’s supposed to help boost your immune system.If you're interested in trying it out for yourself, head over and pick up a starter kit. It has all the beginner oils you'll need to get your family healthy this season! Plus, if you sign up with me I can help you along the way!
Click here to sign up!
Fun Ways To Introduce Your Kids To New Foods
This post is sponsored by Happy Family. All opinions are my own.
Moms around the world know how tricky it can be to convince their kids to try new foods.You spend all day in the kitchen only for your kids to look at it with disgust and act like it's radioactive. They don't care how long it took you to make, they just see new and scary.What's a mom to do?You need to find a way to get through to your picky eaters and show them how fun and adventurous it can be to try new things.
Make It Fun
Make new time a big game when you introduce something new. Most of your kid's reluctance to trying anything new is the fear behind it. They don't know what it's going to taste like and they're worried it will be as disgusting as they assume it is.Turn their spoon into a train, make silly voices each time it gets close to their mouth, and just make the whole thing a fun experience.
Start With It
Trying to get your kids to eat a new food on a full stomach is just asking for problems. Instead, you can limit snacks right before a meal. Then offer up the new dish as the first bite when they're hungry enough to give it a chance.
Pair It With Something They Love
Knowing your kids may struggle with an "adventurous dish" aka anything new... take it slow. Don't offer it up as the only option. Instead, serve it with things they like. You can make macaroni and cheese for lunch and have a side of peas. Then their favorite dish becomes the reward!
Try Different Recipes
Don't give up if your kids have tried a new dish and decide they don't like it. It may not be the ingredients at all but how it's made. Next time you whip it up, try a new recipe. Then you can find the perfect recipe to turn a new food into a favorite food.
Encourage Their Successes!
Trying something new is scary for kids. Go crazy and encourage them every time they go out of their comfort zone and try something. They will be much more willing when they see how exciting it can be!
Start Young
If you want your kids to be open to trying new things, start them young. Show them how fun it can be while they're little!All three of my kids have proven to be picky eaters over the years. However, we're always trying out new things. One day it may be fish curry and the next could be taco salad. I want it all to be fun and a good experience for my kids.This is why I love Happy Family products! Their goal is to make sure infants and toddlers have a positive experience when trying new foods. You can find their products at Target! They just launched a new whole milk yogurt line and the combinations are delicious! They pair ingredients like sweet potatoes with kid-friendly flavors like bananas!Not to mention they use organic ingredients and their yogurt pouches have live cultures in them! This means they're not only tasty but healthy!
How do you get your kids to eat new things?
Surviving Flu Season
Winter has always been tricky for families. It's the time you attempt to hide your kids from the germs that start circulating, usually to no avail. Especially for our family! We move around so often that we tend to be up against brand new bugs every winter.This year the nasty flu bug found our family and came in for the kill. It went through all of us once and then came back around for the second time.One by one all three kids have gone down.I feel terrible for them. Especially as Liam comes down in the middle of the night burning up, trying not to throw up. The momma in me wants to fix it. I want to make him feel better so he doesn't have to be sick anymore. I hate seeing that look in his eyes.Two weeks into flu season and I find my hubby and I sitting there exhausted. We've been up all house of the night, gone through bottles of Tylenol, washed their sheets dozens of times, and made countless bowls of Top Ramen.
Stock Each Room With Supplies
There's nothing worse than waking up to a feverish child in the middle of the night and not being able to find the fever medicine... You try looking everywhere for it, but you have an emotional kid who just wants you to hold him.Save yourself the trouble and make sure each bedroom is stocked with Tylenol, water, and a thermometer. Then you'll have everything you need at your fingertips. Whether it's 3 am or 2 in the afternoon, you're ready and prepared.
Keep Essential Oils/Cleaning Supplies On Hand
When your kids are sick, they're probably coughing over every surface in your home. If you're really lucky they'll even cough on your face like mine do. Somehow. Every time.Cleaning materials are a must! Head over to the store at the first sign of a sick bug and grab all the cleaning supplies you may need. Then you'll have them afterward when your kiddos are feeling better. Flu season is much longer than any of us would like so keep that house as germ-free as possible.
Stick To A Simple Schedule
As a parent, schedules have become a big part of your life. They tell you where you're supposed to be and what you need to do every day. When your kids get sick you may be tempted to keep remnants of your schedule. The problem is it only leads to more stress. Let your kids sleep as much as possible and put everything on hold until they start to feel better.
Figure Out Who's On Call
Everything is harder at night and it's typically the exact moment your sick kids need you the most. Talk to your partner before you go to sleep and figure out who's going to be on call for the night. Who's the one who will get up and give them medicine or will it be both of you? No more fighting over who got up last!
Set Timers
Nothing fries your brain more than a mom who hasn't slept in who knows how long. You probably won't be catching up while your kids are sick so don't plan on remembering anything for a while. Instead of trying to remember when you're supposed to give your kids their antibiotics or fever medicine, set a timer. It will make things much easier for you.
Let Go And Embrace Technology
Embrace the chaos of your sick days and let your kids have access to tv, video games, and just about anything else that will keep them in their bed all day. They need to rest and if that means they watch Disney Channel all day for a few days... will it really matter? No. Give in and don't stress over the tech time.
Coffee
This one really just needs one word. Coffee. Stock up on the coffee. Whether it's brewed coffee, cold brew like me, or you beg your friends to bring you coffee... find a way and have plenty on hand. If you don't drink coffee, may God be with you! I have had more coffee than I thought possible over the last few weeks and you know what... It's okay! I'll go back to my normally obsessive amount when they feel better.
I don't think any of us would be able to sit down at the end of a sick day and say wow that was a good day, however, we can get through it. We can take those sick days one at a time and help our babies get better so we can get back to our normal chaos and crazy.
Helping Your Hot Tempered Child To Calm Down
"The words that come out of your mouth are much more powerful than you realize. They can make someone's day completely better or make them feel like complete garbage. You need to think about that before you start saying mean things..."
This was just a tiny piece of my conversation with my four-year-old last night.He is my sensitive boy. I always have to watch what I say to him because he can find a flaw or insult in just about anything. It almost means a simple compliment for him can mean the whole world!Then why is it so easy for him to say hurtful things to his brothers?Last night, I walked in on my boys fighting over some silly toy. It's not unusual for them in fact if I were to walk in on them playing nicely together... I'd wonder what they were up to.In that moment, I had it. I was completely over the arguing and mean things they were saying to each other. I started to explain just how powerful words are to my four-year-old and noticed he started to get emotional.His tender heart couldn't believe that he had truly hurt his brother's feelings even if his temper told him differently in the moment. The problem is everything goes to the waist-side when his temper is flared.
I've never felt so close to him!The perpetual struggle with your own temper is rough. Especially when you're a little boy trying to sort it all out. The good thing is he feels remorse afterward and he wants to be nice to people around him. That's more than I can say about myself when I'm mad. In the midst of my bad mood, I have no desire to be nice to anyone else.So what can I do? How can I help him try and calm down before he says something he regrets?
Tips To Calm Down Your Hot Tempered Kiddo
Take A Deep Breath
Teach your kids to take a deep breath when they feel like they're about to blow. It gives them a moment to think before they do or say anything they'll regret in the moment.
Find Alone Time
When your kids starts to get upset, teach them to ask for a break. They can go to their room, sit on the back porch, or simply find a little spot in the house to find some peace. Let them calm down on their own and then come back when they're ready.
Ask For A Hug
Sometimes emotions get high and all your child really needs is a big hug and some reassurance. When they get upset, give them a few options to calm down and always offer some love. You'd be surprised just how much can be solved by a tight hug.
Help Your Child Understand Their Feelings
Talk with your kiddo and help them talk through their feelings. You can help them find out what made them so angry and explain what they're feeling. As they learn to identify those feelings they can figure out what to do with them before they get too explosive.
Sing A Song
Find a fun song that can help change the tone of the situation. One of our favorites is Daniel Tiger. All three of my kids know their calm down song and even sing it to each other! Adorable.
Find Something For Them To Do With Their Hands
Anger can quickly turn to fighting with siblings or breaking something. Stop it before it can get there and help your kids find something to do with their hands. You can have them punch a pillow, play with a squishy ball, or play baseball.How do you help your kiddos calm down when they're about to blow a gasket? 
Naptime Ramblings: Mom's Must Have Superpowers
My kids are laying in their beds napping, well pretending to nap. I was going to take a little nap myself, but I hear them upstairs talking to each other. I know it's only a matter of time before they come downstairs tattling on each other or trying to barter with me so I let them out of naptime.Instead of getting things done in these few moments, my mind has been wondering. It always wanders to things to truly don't matter, but I can't help but spend way too much energy thinking it all the way through.Have you ever had one of those moments?Today, I've been thinking about superpowers. I blame my boys because it's all they've wanted to talk about since the new Thor came out.For today's naptime ramblings, let's chat about what superpower moms would LOVE!
Eyes In The Back Of Her Head
The age-old myth is that moms have eyes in the back of their heads. While we do have an amazing intuition that kicks in when our kids are being naughty, think how nice it would be if we really did see it all!My little boys are constantly up to some type of mayhem! I would love to be able to catch them before they can make the mess or cut their hair while my back is turned (real story!)
Mary Poppin's Bag
Moms have to carry everyone's crap around constantly. There's the diapers, wet wipes, extra clothes, snacks, bottles, and then everything the rest of the family throws in!Can you hold this?At the end of it all, it can be hard to find room for your own stuff! None of this would matter if moms could transform their purses into a Mary Poppin's Bag!Think about it... A one-stop shop. If you're ever in need all you have to do is put your hand into your bag and pull out anything your mind can think of. As one of the most forgetful moms out there, I know I would love this!
Move Things With Her Mind
Just about every day I think to myself if I had just one more hand it would be perfect. Whether you're trying to grab everything out of the car at the same time or you're nursing on the couch and need to grab something... it would be much easier if we could have a little extra help.If I could move things with my mind my house would always be clean, my kids wouldn't get away with anything, and things would actually be perfect!
Magical Cleaning Abilities
Anyone with boys needs this one. I've mentioned before how messy boys can get, especially in the bathroom. My boys are always missing the toilet and it drives me crazy! Especially now that they're all potty trained!If it's not pee, it's toilet paper EVERYWHERE.I would love to just push a button or say something and watch my bathroom get cleaned before my very eyes. Admit it, you would kill for this one!What superpower would you choose?
Things Only A Boy Mom Can Understand
When people find out that I have all boys, they look at me completely shocked. They quickly tell me what a brave woman I am and that they don't know how I do it.Well, I'm going to let you in on a little secret.. I don't know how I do it either!My husband and I always knew we wanted to have kids. We talked about it early on in our relationship. However, when we talked about it we never realized we'd have all boys!Our once quiet and structured lives have turned into noise and chaos. Even on one of the hard days, we both love it. We love our little boys so much and they've taught us more than we ever could have imagined.We'll be sitting down for dinner and our four-year-old is always singing some new song to himself."I love spicy chicken curry! Even the bread, but I love my chicken more because it's better than Liam's!"Dinner immediately becomes a competition between all three of our boys and they rarely remember to use their inside voice. Sometimes they even excuse themselves to go and wrestle in the living room so they can see who the winner is once and for all.Okay, more than just sometimes.I start to think how completely crazy my life is until I find another boy mom. She always understands exactly what my days are like. It doesn't even shock her when I tell her why I'm late... Even though it probably has to do with the fact I was cleaning up pe because my two-year-old decided to pee in a Gatorade bottle. (This really happened y'all!)
7 Things Boy Moms Everywhere Understand
Pee Everywhere
Boy moms are no stranger to pee. It's everywhere. It doesn't matter if your kids have been potty trained for years or if they're in diapers. It's going to get everywhere.You may as well quarantine the bathrooms now because they never get it in the toilet! Not to mention they're fascinated with it! They think it's funny to pee in the garbage next to the toilet and even the tub...When you ask them what excuse they could possibly have... they just smile.
Constantly Buying Food
Little boys are never full. They will probably put up a fight when it comes to dinner because they're picker than all get out, but in between meals is when they really get you.They're constantly in the fridge and pantry. They assume you're hiding the goods so they rifle through it all.It only gets worse as they get older. My kids are 2, 4, and 6 and I swear they're trying to eat me out of house and home. I can't imagine what they're going to be like when they become teenagers!
Everything Turns Into Wrestling
They could start out reading a book to themselves or cleaning their rooms and they will somehow end up wrestling. There's no rhyme or reason to why it starts, but it always does.Usually younger one knowingly takes it too far and then runs to hide behind mom. Then you're left trying to mediate and keep the older one from killing said brother.Right as you think you have it solved, someone sucker punches the other one and they run off in a hurry. Age doesn't stop them either. I never thought a baby could throw a sucker punch until I saw my 2-year old messing with his older brothers.My husband tries to tell me it's how they all bond. I just hope they all survive the bonding!
Bodily Functions Are Hillarious
You can try all you want to convince your kids to talk appropriately at all times, but at the end of the day, bodily functions are hilarious to them.You're really in for it when they learn to fart on command. All three of my kids can and I swear they stink us out of the whole room. My husband and I end up leaving only to hear them yelling "victory" as we close the door behind ourselves!The worst is when they do it in public. Someone does it by accident and of course, I start to yell at them. Then the younger one does it to make his brothers laugh. Then you're outnumbered because they think they're freaking hysterical!
Everything Turns Into A Weapon
I love watching my kids play and seeing where their little imaginations can take them. Especially how it doesn't matter what toy they have in their hands, they'll always pretend it's a weapon.You may have something against your kids playing with weapons and refrain from buying them. However, I'm going to let you in on a little secret.. They'll pretend every other toy they have is one anyways.I've even seen my kids turn their cousin's Barbie into a super secret agent with lasers for eyes and swords coming out of her hands. I'm telling you... They're crazy and love pretending things shoot.
At the end of the days, boy moms deserve a freaking award for the things they experience day in and day out!
My Son Is Colorblind
I'm very excited to introduce you to Rebecca, a presently homeschooling mother of 2, wife to her teenage sweetheart, and author & illustrator of Evie & Alistair: Farmhouse Warriors, now available on Amazon.
This is not a metaphor in regard to racial equality, being that he is a brown boy raised in a peach family. In fact, that metaphor is a significant irritation due to its unintended implications that we are choosing to overlook something that is perceived as inherently less-than in order to accept a person in spite of what they possess, rather than embracing or wholly valuing a person, with color being a fundamental ingredient in the makeup of who they are.Medically speaking, our son has strong deuteranomaly. Without the intervention of technology or a miraculous act of God, he will never see color rightly. That’s just the state of how he was wired in all his humanness. This doesn’t mean that there is something innately wrong with his personhood. It simply means that his visual perception is off.Colorblindness isn’t the only issue with our boy’s vision, and quite honestly, he is so good at compensating for it I may have never been aware of his struggles if a routine screening hadn’t indicated such. He seemed to recognize characters without trouble, he wasn’t squinting or complaining of headaches, and at the time his mix-ups in color recognition could be chalked up as age appropriate. He correctly identified them much of the time too, which cleverly masked his distortion. It’s just that his eyes are the only eyes that he has ever lived with, so he had adapted his output quite well, and at first none of us knew that what he was taking in wasn’t the right thing.His perception is totally valid, understandable, and logical. But its legitimacy & rationality don’t change the fact that it is wrong.Our boy is a problem solver by nature. For example, when he wanted me to cook a grilled cheese sandwich but I was unwilling, he took it upon himself to toast bread in the toaster, put cheese on it, and melt it in the microwave (since he’s not allowed to use the stove). I thought that showed pretty good ingenuity and initiative for a then 5 (now 7) year old.I’ve noticed this quality playing out in the practicality of education as well. Often his instructions would be to color a certain section according to a calculated sum. You know… color all of the 4’s yellow, color all of the 9’s purple, etc. Initially, though his arithmetic was correct, his colors were off. A lot. Understanding that it was due to the challenge with his eyesight, if I even were to say anything at all I may occasionally point out, “This is actually green and not brown, although I know it’s hard for you to see that.” As time went on, I realized that he hadn’t been making as many mistakes. I honestly just thought that his improvements were simply due to lucky guessing. Until one day, I noticed something peculiar out of the corner of my eye: our son would pick up a crayon, gaze at it intently, put it down. Pick up another crayon, examine it, put it down. Pick up another crayon, pause, use it. He was reading the labels! Duh! It never even occurred to me to suggest for him to do this, though it probably should have. (Hooray for getting that whole reading thing down).
Our boy acknowledged his weakness. He didn’t whine about it being hard. He didn’t make excuses about how he couldn’t help that he sees things the way he sees them. He didn’t play the victim and protest the way that he was made and wallow in self-defeat. He simply allowed his weakness to become an opportunity to exercise his strength.Our son went to the source– referred to the name that the crayon was designed to be, and did the next right thing in accordance to the truth—regardless of how he saw it. And what a beautiful picture was made.I don’t know about you, but I’m a grown-up and I still struggle with a tendency to elevate my perception and experiences as the standard of truth. Based upon the evidences set forth amidst the racially charged society in which we live, I am certain I am not the only one. Insides bow up against spoken truths when they feel like threats to our intentions, credibility, and value. I get stuck on not wanting to be misunderstood and so choose silence over solidarity. Frustrations arise at the brokenness and blindness of civilization, and I’m grievously overwrought when I realize my own. Peace is touted as a means to villainize the cries of the oppressed, justifying our comfort rather than actually pursuing justice necessary to bring about the genuine peace we claim to seek.The most worthwhile words of advice I have ever received as the white mother of a black son have been those that have directed my eyes to be opened to the full scope of history and culture, to not automatically shut out discomfort as my privilege allows, and to truly, intentionally see. Because no matter how I raise him, my dark brown son is going to grow up to be a dark brown man, walking independently of my white umbrella-shield. Choosing to turn a blind eye to the reality of what’s out there when others’ interactions are often based upon their own perceptions in regard to color does him no benefit, and is in fact a disservice that sets him up to be overcome by shock and awe.In the case of my son’s vision, I would not have taken the steps necessary to help him compensate for his deficiencies in vision if nobody ever told me they existed. He never would have bothered to work through his own inaccuracies if he were never made aware that he wasn’t seeing things quite right. Berating him for his shortcomings would have been absolutely asinine and not at all helpful. But the truth still needed to be lovingly spoken in order for a beneficial change to be made. Here’s the thing: once we see, we can’t unsee. We are responsible for our awareness. It hurts, it’s hard, and it takes a whole lot of grit. But in that striving and ache is exactly where beautiful strength and unity is birthed.
If you'd like to hear more from Rebecca, head over today and pick up her new book! Evie & Alistair: Farmhouse Warriors, now available on Amazon.
Choosing The Best Car Seat For All Your Kids
As a mom, I've had to learn a few things about what it means to make things last. I have three boys and it means everything I buy is times three! I have to buy three sets of dress clothes for holidays, three sets of cleats for sports, three sets of winter jackets, and three sets of car seats.It gets expensive!It's because of this I've learned how to stretch a dollar. I go to the store looking for more than how cute it is. While style is important, dependability is the priority. I look for items I like, but know will last for all three kids.If not, I know I'll end up back at the store for child number two!
One item I've learned quite a bit about over the years is a good quality car seat. The first time I picked up a car seat was terrifying. I was pregnant and had no idea what to look for. Luckily, I had a friend who pulled me under her wing and let me borrow her Graco infant car seat.When he was ready to upgrade, I made a poor decision. I purchased a car seat that was cheap but had nowhere near the level of safety as my very first car seat. I returned it the same day and purchased a new and upgraded Graco car seat.We've been a Graco family ever since that moment. Their car seats are made to last, their car seats are rigorously tested to meet or exceed US FMVSS safety standards, and they are a great deal!
Now that our kids are bigger, we still know Graco is the brand to trust with our child's safety.Our kids love their seats too! They always tell us they like to take naps in their seats because of the cozy headrests. Not to mention, they love that they're big enough to get themselves buckled up! They hop straight in the car, buckle themselves in, and ask if we're there yet...
While it may be easy to buckle up, it's not easy enough for them to unbuckle themselves. Our Graco 4Ever seat straps into our car with the built in seat hooks and gives you the directions you need whether you're using forward facing or rear facing.
When I went on the hunt for our new Graco 4Ever car seat I price checked around my neighborhood. The prices were different everywhere I went. The absolute best deal I found was at Walmart. My favorite thing about Walmart is that you can order their products online! Then you can choose to pick up at the store or have them ship it to your house! Either way you don't have to lug the kids inside, only for them to ask for about a dozen other things!
We had them ship our car seat to our home and it was free 2 day shipping! I'm always up for free shipping!All of this has taught me one thing... Parents need to remember to invest wisely into their kid's necessities. While it may save you a few dollars in the moment, you need to think about how much it will save you in the long run.Buy a car seat that will last!
The Secret On Keeping Up With A Chaotic Schedule
Life over the last six years has become unbelievably busy. I went from having one little boy and a semi-quiet home to three boys, two dogs, a revolving door of roommates, and sprinkle in a bit of homeschool and sports.I remember when parents used to tell me to enjoy my time home while I could. While my kids were little, we spent most of our time at home. We didn't have a big need to leave the house often other than for play dates.This year it's all changed. Our quiet little life has turned into complete chaos!
While I still have a good chunk of time at home, it's filled with things to do. We decided to homeschool our two oldest kiddos again this year. My oldest, Liam is 6 years old and his school time is a little more rigid and requires us to get through more every day.Then we have sports... Our once quiet and boring weekends are now FULL of practices and games. Our kids love it and it makes it all worth it, but my husband and I are constantly going to and from the field, carrying everything imaginable on our backs.Someone (we won't name names) also decided to adopt a puppy while her husband was away on a work trip. I used to just have one old dog who loved to sleep all day. Then I brought our new puppy into our lives and home.Wow.She's nonstop.She's our new little toddler who runs around finding new things to get into and chew up every day. I can't turn my head for more than a minute otherwise I find her making my life much more difficult.
Luckily, I know her puppy stage won't last forever. She is such a little sweetheart, chewing aside. She follows the kids around all day and won't ever turn down a good belly rub.All of that to say, our lives have been turned upside down this year. Keeping up has definitely been a challenge.I know many of you have been there. It may not be due to surprise puppies, homeschool, sports, and three boys, but you know the feeling. You know what it's like to get so stressed out you'd rather hide in bed than face it all. This year I'm determined to get a better handle on everything. I don't want to spend my days catching up.Instead, I'm changing things up this year. I've learned a little secret tool to getting back in control of my days and it's something you can do too.
Get On Auto-Pilot.
We all have a handful of things that happen routinely each month. It may be groceries you buy each week, bills that get paid on the same day each month, and so on.Take a few things off your plate by going on auto-pilot. You don't need to wait until your bill is due to pay it. You can get on auto-payments. This way, you know it will get paid on time each month without even having to lift a finger.
Do the same thing with your groceries. One of my favorite things to do is get my dog food through Amazon's subscribe and save program! You can save up to 5% when you purchase your Hill's Science Diet pet food this way! We love getting Hill's Science Diet for our pups. Vets even choose it for their own pets and it's their #1 choice today!Both of my pups eagerly know what's arrived when the delivery guy comes to the door! Their little tails wag and can hardly wait for us to open the package for them!
I know I'm not the only one who's ended up running to the store last minute to pick up dog food because you had no idea you were out. Or because your kids decided to pour it all into the dog's water to make it "easier" for them to eat/drink.I make sure to schedule my dog food deliveries early just in case the kids decide to "help" me out. I'm never without this must have for my dogs.This was also a huge help while we were busy traveling this summer. We were always heading out for different family events and even through in a few vacations. My brother stayed back to watch the dogs and he didn't have to worry about anything!
How do you and your family keep up with your busy life?
Lessons We Can Learn From Our Kids
Do you ever find yourself sitting on the couch, avoiding all of your responsibilities, and watching Captain Underpants with your kids for the fifth time?Oh, just me?I sit there and think about all the things I need to get done, but it doesn't urge me off the couch. If anything I sink in deeper and deeper with every thought. Not to mention, cuddles from my little boys can seriously cure just about anything.They're so carefree and I love watching them. The smallest things make them happy. Even a silly movie about a superhero in underpants! I need to take a few lessons from them on how to let go of the stress and just enjoy my day.
Sometimes You Just Need A Hug To Make It All Better
You really don't know the power of a hug until you have kids. Something catastrophic can happen to one of them (like a tiny scrape on the knee.... catastrophic) and they can start looking their minds. Right when you think they may never calm down, you walk over and give them a tight hug. You feel them start to relax in your arms and they know everything is going to be okay.I think we as adults need hugs just as bad. Life can turn into complete chaos around us and sometimes a hug is the answer. Even at almost 30, a hug from my mom feels just as good.
Focus On The Task At Hand
As much as we'd all love for our kids to be able to do more than one thing at a time, it just doesn't happen. If they sit down to do homework, their focus will be completely lost the moment they start thinking about dinner. Or they start to go upstairs to grab something like you've asked them to do and forget everything when they see a toy they left on the top stair.Even though it drives us crazy, they may have a point. Sometimes, we have to turn our brains down and just focus on one thing at a time. Maybe it's an evening with your kids and you know you need to set your phone down. Or maybe it's focusing all of your attention onto your spouse while on a date rather than listing off your to do list in your head.
It's Okay To Take A Break
My kids are constantly taking breaks throughout their extremely "difficult" days. Soccer is the perfect example. My son will be on the field for all of two minutes before he desperately needs a Gatorade break. In his mind, he's worked as long as he can and now he needs a little r and r.How often do we give ourselves breaks? We look at the to do list in front of us and tell ourselves there's no way we can justify a break. Take a little note from your kids and give yourself a break just because. You work your tail off every day and you don't need an excuse to kick your feet up for a minute or 30!
Not Everything Is As Important As You Think
There have been so many times I sit stressed out at my desk, only to have one of my kids come up to me and ask why I don't just stop. "Momma, why can't you just stop if it's making you so mad?" I always shrug it off because what do they know... right...?As adults, we tend to think everything is life and death. We struggle with the stress and uncertainty of life, but at the end of the day it's okay. Not everything is as big of a deal as we think. The world will keep turning if we don't fold all the laundry before bed. Your kids will survive if they eat mac n cheese for dinner... again.
A Bit Of Encouragement Goes A Long Way
As a homeschool mom, I've seen how important encouragement is for my boys. They truly thrive on it. When they're working on something difficult they're quick to give up unless I stand behind them acting as their cheerleader!We all need a bit of encouragement in our lives. It's been driven into our heads just how hard we need to be on ourselves. Instead, we should take a moment to pat ourselves on the back. Think about all the successes we've had! Fill your life with people that will do the same thing. If we thrived on encouragement as a child, think about how important it is in your life currently!What is one lesson your kids have taught you?
How To Teach Our Kids Self-Love
As a little girl, summers were special. They meant a break from school for our whole family. My mom worked at a school so she was on the same school schedule as my little brother and I. Our summers were full of days at the beach and sleepovers. If we could have lived on the water we would have.It was the place that just made everything go away. Bad days, stressful season, everything would simply wash away in the water.There was just one little problem. Summers also meant something else. Every moment of sun meant another freckle on my face.You may laugh, but as a kid, I hated my freckles. No one else in my class had them and they made me stand out. Everyone would make comments about them and they made me feel different.
As a kid, being different is uncomfortable.
There isn't this sense of pride that comes along with it, instead, it makes you feel set apart from your friends.If only I could have told my younger self not to worry because one-day freckles would start trending. One day everyone would want to have your freckles so badly that they'll even get them tattooed on their face.I hope it doesn't take my boys a decade to realize how special they are for being uniquely them. Instead, I want them to look at who they are and be proud.I want them to look at their passions and do what makes them happy, even if it's not what their friends are doing.I want them to stop comparing themselves to other families out there and be proud to have a multiracial family that looks different.
I want them to look in the mirror before they head off for school and smile because they're content with who they are.
So how can we as their parents, teach them to love themselves? How can we help them bypass the years of self-hatred that too many kids face and go straight to loving who they are?It's not as complicated as you may think it is. One of the best ways to help you kids love themselves is by loving yourself first.It all started with mom, so why are we surprised to find out self-love does as well?Our kids watch every move we make.
We are their living, breathing example of everything.
They're looking to us to figure out how they should think, talk, and behave.The problem is we're not always what we teach. It's why we tell them so often to "Do what I say, now what I do." Part of it's our imperfect nature. There is no way we will ever be the perfect example to our kids and I think it's better that way. Instead of giving them this impossible image to attain to, we're showing them what it looks like to lead an imperfect life and how to respond to failure.We're going to do and say the wrong things at times and it's okay. It's the best moment to teach our kids a lesson. You can use the opportunity to be vulnerable with your kids and let them know you were wrong and give them a glimpse into your journey.
Self-love has been that imperfect journey for myself.
I look at my stretch marks, the weight I just can't get off after baby Lucas, and love isn't the first thought that comes to mind. Instead, it's self-hate and comparison. I look at other moms that lost the weight immediately after they had their baby and the mom that bypassed the ugly stretch marks and wonder why I can't look like that. The more I lose myself into the self-loathing, the more it starts to come out verbally."Why am I so fat?""These stretch marks are so ugly."You may not realize, but little ears hear it all. They pick up on the negativity and start to look at their own body twice. If their own mom hates what she looks like, they instinctually start to question theirs.
This leads to the road of self-loathing that takes decades to get over.
If we want our children to love themselves, we have to love ourselves first. We have to let the self-hate go and verbally praise the things we do love about our bodies and selves.It's okay if it's small at first. The more you fill your life with positivity, the easier it will become. Then you'll slowly realize how far you've come and how much you truly do love about yourself.